


Best Laid Plans

by captainkippen



Category: Andi Mack (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, M/M, Romance, Slow Burn, the theme of this is 'boys are stupid'
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-22
Updated: 2018-12-22
Packaged: 2019-09-24 23:44:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 21,261
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17110394
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/captainkippen/pseuds/captainkippen
Summary: “I guess I realised how much I like him, y’know?” Said Cyrus.TJ quirked an eyebrow at him but didn’t call his bluff. Instead, he just flicked another couple of M&Ms across the table. “I get that,” he said, smiling slightly. “Sometimes crushes come out of nowhere.”Asking TJ for help in getting his crush's attention seemed like a great idea at the time, but Cyrus never anticipated that he'd fall for him in the process.





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in three days. Bless the motivation Gods.
> 
> You can find me on tumblr @captainkippen

It had been four years, two months and eight days since Cyrus Goodman met the love of his life, Jonah Beck. Unfortunately for Cyrus, upon their meeting, Jonah did not seem to share the same earth-shattering realisation of true love as he did, and as a result, it had also been four years, two months and eight days since Cyrus Goodman began pining for the love of his life, Jonah Beck. How did Cyrus know Jonah was the love of his life? Good question, after all, they were only in middle school when they first met and most people would argue that a twelve-year-old probably doesn’t know all that much about true love. Well, to answer your question, Cyrus respectfully disagreed with this take. He knew it was true love, mostly because the first time he saw Jonah’s face it felt as if he’d been hit by lightning, and he had only grown more certain over the years, egged on by their blossoming friendship. Sure, several things had gotten in the way of this true love in the past, but that didn’t really matter. Cyrus was content to sit back and love Jonah as wholly and completely as he could, with no expectation of his feelings ever being returned. After all, it was unlikely that Jonah would ever like him back for multiple reasons, for example, Jonah’s past on-off relationship with Cyrus’ best friend Andi Mack wasn’t the most ideal situation in the world and, obviously, the fact that Jonah was straight threw a bit of a wrench in the works… or at least it had.

Up until about five minutes ago, Cyrus had been perfectly content knowing he had no chance with Jonah, mostly because up until five minutes ago he had been under the illusion that Jonah only liked girls. Jonah, however, had clearly decided to smash that illusion with a hammer today when he sat all of his friends down at their favourite diner, The Spoon, and admitted something that none of them had expected.

“You’re what?” Cyrus said, the baby tater in his hand frozen halfway to his mouth in disbelief.

“Bisexual,” Jonah replied, calmly.

“Cool, does that mean I’m the only straight one here?” Marty asked.

“We can start a club,” Buffy suggested happily. “Instead of the Good Hair Crew, we can be known as the Good-Bi Crew. Ha.”

“You’re bisexual,” Cyrus repeated, dropping his baby tater altogether (a true testament to his shock, usually he would never let any harm come to his favourite food). “Bisexual. You. How long have you known this? How didn’t we know this?” He turned to Andi who was sat beside him. “Did you know this?”

Andi nodded. “I knew.”

“Do you think I can get Amber to put extra chocolate sauce in my milkshake,” Jonah asked, apparently having grown bored with the topic of his sexuality. Cyrus couldn’t believe how calm everyone was. He knew, obviously, that it wasn’t that big of a deal but he honestly felt like he had just entered a whole new world.

“Bisexual,” He murmured to himself, under his breath. Buffy elbowed him discreetly, as if to say ‘knock it off you’re being weird’, and so Cyrus shoved a tater in his mouth to prevent himself from blurting out anything else ridiculous like ‘I’m in love with you, Jonah’ or ‘Does this mean I have a shot at marrying and raising eight babies with you now’. He needed to calm down.

He managed to keep his cool for another half an hour at least, until Jonah excused himself to head to Ultimate Frisbee practice and headed off, stealing several of Cyrus’ fries as he went with a quick muffled ‘later’ to the rest of the crew. Then, Cyrus promptly turned to everyone else and let it all out.

“Bisexual!”

Buffy snorted. “Why are you acting like a lunatic over this? You weren’t like this when Andi started dating Amber, or when I came out to you.”

“It’s because he’s not in love with us,” Andi said with an amused smirk.

“Oh hush,” Cyrus groaned, dropping his head into his arms dramatically. “I can’t believe I thought he was straight this whole time.”

“What difference does it make? He knew he was bi. If he felt the same about you wouldn’t he have said something by now?” Buffy pointed out. Marty must have elbowed her if the resulting yelp was anything to go by. “I mean… not that there’s not the possibility that he likes you back or anything.”

“You don’t have to try and save my feelings,” Cyrus replied, lifting his head with a sigh. “I know it doesn’t change anything, but before he told us at least I could tell myself I didn’t have a chance because he didn’t like guys and that it wasn’t just because he didn’t like me.”

“He does like you,” Andi said. “You’re like his best friend. You guys do everything together.”

“I mean like as in like-like, Andi. Like he liked you, except… not that.”

“Well, maybe it’s because he never thought you were interested before.”

“What? He must know I like him by now. Everyone knows.”

“That’s true,” Buffy agreed.

“That doesn’t mean anything,” Andi said. “Everyone knew I liked him, and he never realised until it was actually pointed out to him. You know what Jonah’s like, he’s kind of oblivious. Maybe you just need to like… make your feelings clear to him.”

Cyrus thought about this for a moment. He’d always thought it was fairly obvious how he felt about Jonah, after all, he was well known for wearing his heart on his sleeve. He’d been under the impression he and Jonah simply didn’t talk about it because it was easier than acknowledging something that could potentially make their friendship awkward, but Cyrus had never considered that it might actually be because Jonah didn’t know Cyrus liked him.

“I don’t know… I don’t want to ruin things between us. He’s my best friend, what if he doesn’t like me back and it makes everything weird? Losing him isn’t worth it. Besides, I wouldn’t even know how to tell him.”

Andi and Buffy exchanged a look that Cyrus knew all too well. It was the ‘Cyrus is being overdramatic again’ look and it was only one step away from blatant eye-rolling.

“Look, Cy,” Andi said. “You just said it yourself - Jonah is your best friend. Even if he didn’t feel the same, and he’d be stupid if he didn’t by the way because you’re awesome, he would never let it get weird. You could never lose him, you care about each other too much.”

“And isn’t it better to tell him how you feel now. I mean, what if you never get another chance?” Buffy argued. “We have one year left of school after this, and who knows where we’ll all end up for college. What if he meets someone else and you never get a chance to confess how you feel. You owe it to yourself to tell him.”

“I’d date you,” Marty piped up. “Y’know, if I was into guys and stuff.”

“Shush, you’re not helping,” Buffy said, poking Marty in the side. “My point is, I think you should give it a shot. Worst case scenario? He’s not into you and you have to move on, but you still have him in your life as a friend. But best case? You get to go out with the guy you’ve been crushing on for years who’s already one of your best friends. You get to be happy. Like me and Marty.”

Cyrus must’ve still looked uncertain because Andi sighed and patted his hand gently.

“Maybe you should just start with flirting a little, ease your way into it?”

That actually seemed like a better idea than a dramatic confession of any kind, Cyrus thought. There was only one problem…

“But I don’t know how to flirt,” He said. “I’ve never successfully flirted with anyone before. Remember that one time I tried to talk to that guy in my bio class? I totally froze up. It was awful.”

Buffy and Marty looked at each other knowingly.

“We know someone who can help with that,” Buffy said.

This was going to end badly, Cyrus thought when they told him the name. This was the worst idea anyone had ever had, but Buffy was right he had to try.


	2. Two

Cyrus didn’t know much about TJ Kippen other than that he shared the basketball team captaincy with Buffy, that he was Marty’s best friend, and that he was kind of mean sometimes (or at least, he used to be). Cyrus had vague memories of TJ and Buffy arguing a lot when they first started playing together, but Marty said that as much as Buffy and TJ liked to bicker now TJ had grown up a lot since then. Despite Marty’s many reassurances, it didn’t stop Cyrus from mentally dubbing TJ ‘Scary Basketball Guy’ the second he spotted him. This was a terrible idea.

“This is a terrible idea,” He said to Marty, as Marty sighed and pushed in TJ’s direction.

“C’mon, you can do this. He’s not gonna bite.”

“Are you sure about that?” 

“ _Cyrus.”_

“Alright, I’m going!” Cyrus took a deep breath and began walking towards TJ. He was standing on the school’s front steps chatting happily with a few of his friends, two guys Cyrus recognised from the basketball team, one a pretty blonde boy with a sharp face,  the other a tall brunette. They didn’t look like murderers or anything but, as a group, they had that cliquey jock vibe that instantly made Cyrus feel much more intimidated than he should. He’d never spoken to any of them before personally, except maybe once to say excuse me when they were blocking his path in the hall (they hadn’t listened, and he’d been late to class). Luckily for his’ nerves, TJ’s friends dispersed shortly before Cyrus reached them, laughing happily at whatever they’d just been joking about. TJ turned as Cyrus approached, meeting his eye unexpectedly. Cyrus’ stomach twisted strangely. Maybe he still had time to change direction, if he ran away now he could pretend he hadn’t even seen TJ maybe, he could… oh. His feet stopped. He’d come face to face with TJ Kippen. It was only then that Cyrus was struck by the fact he’d never actually seen this boy that close up before. He couldn’t help but notice how green TJ’s eyes were. 

“Can I help you?” TJ’s voice suddenly snapped Cyrus back to reality. 

“Oh, um. Hi.” Cyrus stuck out his hand awkwardly. TJ did not shake it. “...Right, uh. I’m Cyrus. Cyrus Goodman. I believe you know my friend Buffy Driscoll?”

“I know who you are,” TJ said, his harsh demeanour softening slightly as if he found Cyrus amusing.  “We have World History together.” 

“We do?” Cyrus asked, trying to remember seeing TJ in that class. It was the one class he shared with Jonah, so it was possible he hadn’t noticed TJ because he was completely oblivious to anything else when Jonah was around. TJ rolled his eyes and turned to walk away. 

“Wait, I have something to ask you!” Cyrus hurried after him, and they fell into step next to each other. For a moment he could only be grateful for the growth spurt he’d had over the summer -  if it weren’t for his long legs he was certain he would have to jog to keep up with TJ. “So, you like… know how to talk to people right?” From the look TJ gave him, Cyrus guessed he wasn’t doing a very good job of not seeming like a crazy person. 

“Yes, Goodman. I know how to talk to people, I’m pretty sure you do too.”

“No I mean you know how to _talk_ to people.”

TJ stopped walking suddenly, so Cyrus stuttered to halt and turned to face him.

“Is this some sort of weird joke that I’m not getting?”

“No! No. I mean…” Cyrus sighs, running a hand through his hair nervously, and lowers his voice slightly. “Buffy and Marty said you’re good at flirting with people. You are, right?” 

It was TJ’s turn to look uncertain. He shifted awkwardly. “I mean yeah, I guess? Why?” 

“Well… when it comes to flirting I have sort of a, um, physical issue?” 

TJ smirked. “A physical issue?” 

“No wait, stop imagining horrible things!” Cyrus’ cheek flared with heat. “I mean I freeze up when I try to flirt. I’m totally awful at it. Terrible even. I’m the least smooth person on this planet.” 

“And you’re telling me this because…?” 

“I need your help! With that. With flirting.” 

“You want me to flirt with you?”

“No!” TJ raised an eyebrow at him. Cyrus could feel himself starting to sweat. “Not that it wouldn’t be nice... to be flirted with… by you.” Great job, Cyrus you sound like a real genius right now. 

“I know, I was just messing with you,” TJ said. Cyrus let out a loud sigh of relief.  “So what, you want my advice on flirting or something?” 

Cyrus nodded. “Exactly.”

“Anyone you’re aiming to flirt with in particular?” 

“No.” It must’ve come out too quickly to be believable because TJ quirked his eyebrow at him again with another smirk. 

“Hm, I can’t help you if you’re not honest.”

“Did anyone ever tell you that you’re kind of frustrating?”

“Did anyone ever tell you that you’re kind of strange?”

“All the time,” Cyrus said solemnly. They stared at each other for a moment, at a stalemate, before Cyrus finally gave in. “Fine. It’s Jonah Beck.” 

“Jonah Beck?” TJ repeated disbelievingly. “You want to flirt with Jonah Beck? _You_ like Jonah Beck, the guy who’s obsessed with frisbees and plays Wonderwall on the guitar at parties?”

“If you’re just going to mock me I can leave,” Cyrus huffed, turning away.

“No, wait-” TJ reached out and pulled him back around gently. “I’ll teach you how to flirt with Beck.”

“You will?”

Cyrus couldn’t believe it. If he was honest, there had been a little part of him during the lead up to this conversation that believed he was definitely going to get punched or something for asking. Especially considering this was the first time he’d ever really spoken to TJ. He was incredibly aware of what a weird way this was to introduce yourself to somebody. It was shocking that TJ had agreed so easily. 

“On one condition.”

Ah, of course, there was a catch.

“I’ll do anything… as long as it doesn’t involve violence. Or dirt. I’d really prefer there not to be dirt.” 

TJ snickered. “No dirt, I promise. You know the history project we’ve got coming up?”

“The one on influential figures of the 20th century? Yeah.”

“I want you to be my partner for it.”

For a moment, Cyrus thought maybe he’d misheard. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t thrown. He was expecting TJ to ask him to do his homework for him maybe, but not to be his partner. That would involve four entire weeks of them working together.

“You want me to be your partner,” Cyrus repeated. “As in project partner? You want to work together on the project for World History? That’s your catch?

“Yup.”

“Can I ask why?

“You’re really smart, and you work hard. I want to get a good grade. You can help me with that.”

“Okay, you realise that means we’ll have to actually spend time together, right? Like outside of school and stuff? It’s a big project.”

“I know,” TJ shrugged. “Like I said, I want to get a good grade. ‘Sides, we’d have to spend time together if agreed to help you with the flirting thing, so that’s my offer, take it or leave it.”

Cyrus considered this for a moment. Surely it wouldn’t be so bad to do his World History project with TJ, he didn’t seem like he was planning to murder Cyrus and bury his body in the park or anything yet, and while it would mean giving up partnering with Jonah it also meant he’d be able to gain some valuable life skills that could potentially help him eventually spend _more_ time with Jonah.  

“Okay, deal.” He agreed, sticking out his hand. This time TJ actually shook it, and Cyrus tried to ignore the warm feeling that bloomed in his chest as he did. It felt like he’d just made a new friend.  


*******

 

“Mission ‘Teach Cyrus To Flirt’ is a go,” Cyrus said, putting his lunch tray down and sliding onto the seat across from Buffy and Andi.

Buffy nodded. “Marty told us you spoke to TJ. Nice work, I didn’t think you’d actually do it.”

“Honestly, I thought I was gonna pee my pants at one point. He’s kind of scary. He was pretty nice about it though.”

“Hm, he’s not that bad I guess. Just annoying. I can’t believe he agreed to it though.”

Cyrus nodded, focusing on squirting ketchup across any many fries as he could to prevent Andi from stealing them. “He said he’d help me as long as I partnered with him in World History.” 

“So you’re really going through with this?” Andi asked.

“Yeah, I mean why not? You guys were right it could be beneficial. Plus, maybe it will improve my confidence or something.”

“Change the subject,” Buffy warned. “Jonah’s on his way over.” 

Andi and Cyrus looked over to see Jonah strolling into the cafeteria. It took him twice as long as it would for a normal person to reach the table because he kept stopping to talk to everyone. Cyrus was seriously starting to believe there wasn’t a person within a fifty-mile radius that Jonah didn’t know personally. When he finally got to them his slid into the seat next to Cyrus and pressed right into his side as he reached over to steal a ketchup-drenched fry. Andi made a face.

“Hey guys, how’s it going?”

They all greeted him back happily, Andi launching into an anecdote about something that happened in her first-period chemistry class. Cyrus watched as Jonah’s smile widened into a laugh, butterflies in his stomach fluttering. Suddenly he was really glad that TJ had agreed to help him, maybe the others were right, maybe he did have a chance with Jonah after all.

“Hey,” Jonah said, turning to Cyrus. “So I was thinking about that project we’ve got coming up, I thought maybe we could do it on Bill Gates and his impact on like computers and stuff.”

Cyrus nods, only half-thinking about it. “Computers and stuff…” Andi and Buffy shoot him twin wide-eyed looks. “Oh, shoot! I can’t!”

“What?” Jonah said, face scrunching in confusion.

“I can’t be your partner for the project,” Cyrus said. “I already agreed to be TJ’s.” 

“You’re partnering with TJ,” Jonah said slowly. “TJ… Kippen?” 

“Yes.”

“ _Why?”_

“Good question,” Cyrus laughed nervously. He looked at the girls for help. They both shrugged. Great. Thanks, guys. “I… I don’t know. He just asked.”

“I didn’t even know you knew TJ,” Jonah said. He actually looked disappointed, and Cyrus couldn’t tell whether he felt bad or kind of happy about that. Then he started feeling bad for being happy. He decided to push those feelings away for the moment and sort them out later. 

“Uh, yeah. Sort of. We talk.” 

“You talk? About what?”

“Sports. Buffy,” Cyrus panicked and immediately wished he could close his mouth. “Sports and Buffy.”

“But you don’t like sports.”

“Exactly!”

“I don’t understand.”

Buffy clearly took pity on Cyrus at that moment as she leaned forward and said, “Cyrus wants to learn more about basketball. He’s trying to be supportive, so he asked me to teach him, but I don’t have much time at the moment, y’know? So TJ said he would.”

“TJ Kippen is teaching Cyrus about basketball? Wow… I never thought I’d see the day, I thought you were allergic to exercise, man.”

“Well, I gotta stay healthy. Don’t wanna go dying young now, do I?” Cyrus said cheerfully. He sighed internally, at this rate he would definitely die young. He’d die from stress and embarrassment.

“Okay then. Can I have another fry?” Jonah asked, and that was the end of that apparently.


	3. Three

It was strange for Cyrus to find himself sat in the diner not with his friends but instead with TJ that Thursday after school. Earlier that afternoon TJ had broken the unspoken rules of class seating arrangements by sliding into Jonah’s usual seat next to him. Jonah had actually seemed mildly annoyed about it, and Cyrus had made a note to apologise later, though if he was honest he wasn’t sure why he should apologise when it made life easier to sit with their actual project partners. Jonah had ended up with Gus, a freckled red-haired boy from the Ultimate Frisbee team that had a tendency to follow him around like an overeager puppy, though Jonah didn’t seem to notice or mind that at all. At first, Cyrus hadn’t been sure what to say, but it soon became clear that TJ was easier to talk to than people let on. He actually seemed to find Cyrus funny, which was nice, and Cyrus found him funny in turn. He was pleasant, charming even, and it was a struggle to match this polite friendly TJ with the boy that Buffy had talked smack about for roughly two years straight.

“The Spoon after school?” TJ had suggested as the bell rung, and Cyrus had been quick to agree. So here they were, hanging out like old friends, eating baby taters and discussing the details of their history project. They’d decided to do theirs on George Orwell, and surprisingly TJ had a lot of input. Cyrus wasn’t sure why he didn’t expect to put in the work, but when TJ had asked him to be his partner he had assumed it was because TJ didn’t want to do any work. Cyrus was used to being the only person actually working during group projects, so this was a welcome change. Finally, though, TJ seemed to have had enough and he made this clear by dramatically thumping one of their borrowed library books closed with a loud sigh.

“I think we deserve a break,” he said, “and milkshakes. A break with milkshakes.”

“A milkshake break,” Cyrus smiled. “Sure.”

They’d been working for about an hour, they were probably ahead of their classmates on the work already, Cyrus felt a milkshake break was certainly justified. He was happily slurping away at a strawberry shake when TJ pounced.

“So, flirting." 

Cyrus tried not to choke in surprise. He failed. 

“I take it you haven’t dated that much?”

“How can you tell?” Cyrus asked drily as he dabbed at the milkshake now staining the front of his sweater.

TJ smiled. “There’s not really a lot of guys who’re around here. I mean I guess you could know some guys who’re in the closet, but I was just sort of going off that.”

Oh. “Oh, well yeah. You’re right. I went on a group date once, with a girl in middle school… it didn’t go well.”

“What happened?”

“It was at the carnival. I got sick and puked in my shoe.” 

“In your shoe?!” 

“I was not made for fairground rides.” 

There was a choked off sound, and Cyrus looked up, TJ’s shoulders were shaking slightly, and it took him a moment to realise that he was muffling laughter with his hand pressed to his mouth. Cyrus frowned and threw a balled up napkin at him. “Hey, no laughing at the socially inept!”

“Sorry, sorry,” TJ said, still sniggering slightly. “It’s just… wow. When you said you were bad at flirting I thought you meant like you had bad pick-up lines or something, not _that._ If it helps I once laughed too hard on a date and snorted coke out my nose.”

Cyrus smiled. “It does, actually. Though that doesn’t give me much confidence in your flirting skills.”

TJ waved him off. “I’ve gotten better at it since then.”

“You have? Well then,” Cyrus pulled his notebook and pen towards him. “What’s the first rule of wooing?”

“Wooing,” TJ echoed, staring at him. “Are you going to take _notes_?”

“Duh, this is a lesson, right?” 

“...Fair enough. Okay, rule number one, always make sure the timing is appropriate.” 

“The timing?” 

“Yeah, like… don’t go trying to hit on someone when they’re obviously not in the mood to be hit on. It’s all about getting a feel of the room first, don’t be a creep.” 

“Huh, that’s kind of obvious though, isn’t it?”

“C’mon, you can’t tell me you haven’t met one of those idiot guys who think it’s a great time to start chatting someone up when they’re busy or upset or something.”

Cyrus thought about it. He definitely had met one of those guys. He’d met many of those guys. It was kind of upsetting actually just how many boys he knew didn’t take into consideration other people’s feelings before opening their mouths. He’d seen plenty of dudes be creepy towards Buffy and Andi, although both of them were fierce enough to give a good telling off if they needed to it worried Cyrus anyway.

“You make a good point,” he conceded. “Rule number two?” 

It wasn’t until several hours later that they stopped. Time had flown by, and it had actually shocked Cyrus when he checked his watch and realised he was late for dinner. He’d rushed out, promising to meet up with TJ again later that week for another work session. Surprisingly, he was actually looking forward to it.  


*******

 

In the past few months, Cyrus had found himself coming head to head with random bouts of insomnia. It was incredibly frustrating to lie in bed at night fruitlessly willing himself to go to sleep. This often resulted in him getting up to get a head start on his homework, and tonight was one of those nights. After about two hours of staring at the ceiling feeling both exhausted and wide awake all once he decided to do some extra research for the history project to pass the time, only when he went to his bag to retrieve his notes did he realise his notes weren’t actually in there. After rummaging for a moment he realised what must’ve happened - in his rush to leave The Spoon in time to get home for dinner he’d grabbed TJ’s work folder instead of his own. They were the same brand, and he recalled being mildly surprised that TJ had a folder in the first place, let alone that it was identical to his. Oh well, he could probably work from TJ’s notes. They were doing the same project after all. Carefully he pulled out the loose papers from inside and readjusted the lamp on his desk so he could read them properly. They weren’t notes. 

There were no dates, no details of Orwell’s influence on politics in the 20th Century, but there were paragraphs upon paragraphs of blocking writing. After a moment Cyrus realised he was reading a story, or well… the opening chapters to a book. A wave of guilt swept over him, he shouldn’t be reading this. Creative writing was a very personal thing, and TJ didn’t know him very well, he probably wouldn’t want Cyrus reading it… would he? His eyes drifted back to the page. Surely it wouldn’t hurt to read a couple of lines? It was probably just drabble anyway. 

It wasn’t just drabble, and forty minutes later Cyrus had read three chapters worth of TJ’s story. It was absolutely gripping, he couldn’t put him down for all that he felt guilty about reading it. It was a mystery novel set in 1930s Las Vegas, following the story of an ex-detective as he was pulled back into the world of crime to solve the strange murder of a famous magician’s assistant. By the end of the existing pages, Cyrus was desperate to read more.

He sought TJ first thing the next morning, determined to retrieve his own notes and return the story to its author. He found TJ by his locker. When he noticed Cyrus coming towards him his face broke out into an easy grin, and he said goodbye to his friends to head over and meet him. It was nice, it made Cyrus feel wanted.

“Mornin’, Goodman. You manage to woo the Frisbee King yet?”

“It’s been less than twelve hours since I saw you, when would I have had the time?” Cyrus asked.

“I don’t know, maybe you work inhumanly fast. Maybe you're The Flash in disguise. Who knows, really?”

“I wish I was The Flash, then maybe I wouldn’t get yelled at as much by Coach during gym.”

“Oh, Coach is easy to deal with, you just gotta know how to bribe him. He likes M&Ms and banana bread,” TJ grinned. He had a nice smile, one that you could get lost in, it made you want to smile back twice as bright. Cyrus laughed, and then remembered why he’d come looking for him. He pulled the folder out of his bag. 

“So... when I left the diner last night I think I grabbed your stuff by accident,” He shoved the folder towards TJ. 

“Oh,” Said TJ. “I didn’t notice. If you give me a moment I can grab yours-”

“Is it going to be a book?” Cyrus blurted. Darn his big mouth.

TJ stopped, looked at his own feet for a few moments, and then looked up and shifted awkwardly in place. “You didn’t read it, did you?” He asked in a tone that was probably meant to be casual but missed the mark by several hundred feet. For the first time since meeting him, Cyrus saw a crack in the confident facade he usually wore. The feeling of guilt returned immediately. He didn’t want to lie.

Cyrus bit his lip. “Yes,” He admitted, then apologised hurriedly. “I’m really sorry! I didn’t mean to read it… I mean I pulled them out to check some things and then when I realised it was your stuff I went to put it back right away, honestly, but I read the first line and then I couldn’t stop reading because it was so good, and there were so many twists and I could picture it all in my head like the colours and the lights and the smoke, and you’reareallygoodwriterdidyouknowthat?”

By the time he’d finished speaking, he was actually a little out of breath. Maybe Coach was right to yell at him during gym. TJ stared at him and then cracked a small smile.

“You know you may not be The Flash, but you sure talk as fast as he runs. It’s no biggie, thanks for returning them and… yeah. Thanks.”

“Can I read the rest?” Cyrus mentally cursed himself, he needed to put a stronger leash on his own tongue.

“What?”

Well, he was committed now, no point in pretending. “Can I read the rest of the story? If you’re still writing it.”

“Uh… I haven’t finished it yet.”

“When you do, though,” Cyrus insisted.

“Why?”

“Like I said,” He shrugged. “It’s really good. I kind of want to see how it ends, if you’re okay with me reading it.”

“Um. Well, I haven’t finished the next chapter yet but I guess when I’m done with it you can read it? Maybe you can give me like… I don’t know, feedback or something. To make it better.”

Cyrus smiled. “It’s already great, but I’m totally willing to give feedback. It’s awesome.”

TJ had now gone an interesting shade of red, and Cyrus had never seen someone as confident as him blush like that before. 

“So…” 

“So…” 

“We should probably plan our next study session, right?” TJ suggested as if he had suddenly just remembered they had work to do.

“Sure, I’m free all weekend.”

“Hm, I have work this weekend, but I’m free Monday night if that’s cool?”

“Sure, sounds great.”

Cyrus made a mental note to ask TJ more about his writing on Monday night, and maybe find out if he had any other stories ready to read. You know, for curiosity's sake.

 

*******

 

“Hey,” Said Jonah, flopping down next to Cyrus on his bed. Cyrus pulled out his headphones and looked at him, a smile stretching across his face against his will. It had been like this since they’d met, Jonah letting himself in (the Goodmans had become used to it quickly, and more often than not expected to find Jonah lounging around in Cyrus’ bedroom with him after school if they weren’t at the diner) and distracting Cyrus from whatever homework he needed to do.

“Hey yourself. What’re you doing here, I thought you had practice today?” 

“Cancelled it. Everyone was tired and people have deadlines and stuff, I thought I’d give the team a break. Plus, I haven’t seen you in ages. I wanted to hang out,” Jonah grinned, then held up two chocolate chip cookies. “Needed some of your dad’s famous cookies. I was having withdrawal.” 

Cyrus rolled his eyes. Typical, Jonah was led by his stomach as always. “It’s only been like two days.”

“Feels like two years. What, like you’re not happy to see me?”

“I am! I just didn’t expect you to be around today.” Cyrus closed his laptop and turned to take a cookie from Jonah, biting into it happily. “You know I’m always happy to see you.”

Sometimes Cyrus wished he wasn’t always so happy to see Jonah. It made it very difficult to remember when he was meant to be doing something that _didn’t_ revolve around his friend. They smiled at one another and then proceeded to sit quietly for a few minutes as they munched on their cookies. There was always a lot of quiet when Cyrus was with Jonah unless Cyrus was busy info-dumping about his latest hyper-fixation. When that happened Jonah usually just nodded and smiled in a way that suggested his excitement was amusing. The quiet was okay, though. It was content. Comfortable. This time, though, Jonah was the one to break the silence.

“I came out to my parents,” he said.

Cyrus hadn’t been expecting that. Jonah’s feelings had never been particularly clear on the surface, you usually had to dig to find them, and he didn’t like talking about himself too much unless it was himself in relation to frisbee. Cyrus was still a little surprised that Jonah had actually decided to tell his friends, let alone his parents. Still, he had had time to process now. He would be as supportive as possible.

“Yeah? How did that go?”

“They were cool with it, but… y’know. I don’t know if they were actually listening. Mom said ‘that’s nice’, so maybe she didn’t actually notice what I was saying.”

“I’m sure they were listening,” Cyrus patted him reassuringly. “That’s better than a bad reaction too.”

“True,” Jonah said and paused for a minute before speaking again. “I just wish they’d take a little more interest, you know? Your parents have come to more of my games than my own. I feel like I could fade away and they wouldn’t even realise.”

“They would,” Cyrus said with certainty. While it was true Jonah’s parents weren’t always the most attentive of folk, Cyrus had overheard plenty of their conversations with his own parents boasting about his achievements. “They’re proud of you. How could they not be? You’re awesome.” 

“Thanks, Cy. I’m lucky to have you, you know that?”

Cyrus felt a blush creeping across his skin. He willed himself not to go completely red, as oblivious as Jonah could be he was pretty sure being tomato-coloured was relatively unmissable. He decided to refocus the conversation.

“So are you planning to come out at school?” He asked.

“Hm, I don’t know,” Said Jonah. “I don’t feel like it needs an announcement or anything. I just wanted to tell you guys. I’ve been thinking about it for a while. Since Buffy came out really. Before then I didn’t really think about how you can like guys _and_ girls, right? Then I realised that sort of fit me.”

“I’m proud of you,” Cyrus replied. “Thank you for trusting us with it.”

“I trust you with everything."

“Good, ‘cause we’re always here for you. You know that, right?”

“I know, Cy… well, actually,” He said, tone light and teasing. “You haven’t been around the last couple of days. How’s Kippen? Has he turned you into a basketball maestro yet?”

Cyrus laughed awkwardly. “Not yet, but he’s a pretty good history partner.”

“Better than me?” 

“Definitely,” Cyrus joked, and then screeched happily when Jonah responded by thumping him with a pillow.


	4. Four

The weekend comes and goes in a blur of homework assignments, junk food and helping Andi's parents, Bex and Bowie, make plans for their upcoming wedding. Cyrus adored the entire Mack family, but hanging out with them meant being able to keep up with them which was always easier said than done. By the time Monday came around, he was ready to throw in the towel for the week already.

“So you’ve really never been on a date?” TJ asked. “Since the puking incident, I mean.”

Cyrus shook his head. They were sat together in the library, project work sprawled across a large table, occasionally sneaking M&Ms from a packet half concealed in TJ’s bag when the librarians weren’t looking.

“Never. The idea physically terrifies me. Plus, no one’s ever asked me out, so...”

“I find that hard to believe.”

“Why?”

TJ gestured vaguely at him. “You’re all, y’know. You. And stuff.” Then he cleared his throat loudly and switched subjects. “Anyway, haven’t you ever asked anybody out yourself?”

“I’ve never really wanted to,” Said Cyrus, with a shrug.

“So why now?”

“What?”

“Why’ve you decided you want to try hitting on Beck now? Haven’t you known him for like… ever? What changed?”

“Um,” Cyrus hesitated. Jonah had only just come out to the Good Hair Crew, and it wasn’t really something for Cyrus to share with outsiders. Especially since Jonah had said he didn’t know if he wanted to tell other people yet. “I guess I realised how much I like him, y’know?”

TJ quirked an eyebrow at him, but he didn’t call his bluff. Instead, he just flicked another couple of M&Ms across the table towards him. “I get that,” TJ said, smiling slightly. “Sometimes crushes come out of nowhere.”

Cyrus smiled and ducked his head. TJ had the curious talent of making Cyrus feeling like he was being included in a sweet inside joke by just smiling at him. It was nice; it made him feel understood.

“What’re you going to do if the flirting works, then?” TJ asked, suddenly.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, if you do manage to woo him what’s your plan then?”

“Um… I just see where it goes, then, I guess.” He said, then tacked on hurriedly, “I don’t even know if I have a chance. He might not even like guys.”

TJ shook his head in disbelief. “You mean to tell me that _you_ , the king of planning,” he gestured to the piles of notes and outlines scattered between them, “don’t have a game plan for getting your man? No, c’mon. You gotta be prepared. It’s the first rule of Boy Scouts.”

“I was never in Boy Scouts, my mom says Boy Scouts promote a dangerous ideology revolving around toxic masculinity and patriarchal ideals. Plus, she didn’t want me playing with fire. My flaily limbs near an open flame is a total a health hazard.”

TJ stared at him for a brief moment, then seemed to decide that this was not worth pausing on and waved it off. “Whatever, what I mean is you need to be ready. You said you’ve never been on a date, right? So how’re you gonna ask him out? Or what if he asks you out? What would you do?”

He was raising an interesting point. Cyrus took a moment to imagine trying to ask Jonah on a date. It ended in tears and explosion. He switched to the mental image of Jonah asking him out, a daydream he’d had many times in which liked to pretend he’d be ever so suave with his answer, impressing Jonah with how level headed and casual he was being. However, in reality, he knew if Jonah asked him on a date now he’d probably freeze up, regardless of the fact that they’ve known each other forever.

“I have no idea,” He admitted. “I’d probably just explode or something.”

“Right. Are you free Friday night?” TJ asked.

“Uh, I’m not sure. I might be going to this fancy art thing with my friends. Why?”

“Not anymore you’re not. We’re going on a date,” TJ said, leaning back on his chair looking ever so pleased with himself.

Cyrus’ brain screeched to a halt. He wasn’t sure how they’d gone from talking about him dating Jonah to him dating TJ.

“What? Us? Why?” 

“Chill out. Not a real date, a practice date.”

“Oh, so like another romance lesson?" 

TJ laughed quietly. “Sure, Goodman. Another romance lesson.”

Well, alright then. Cyrus could think of worse ways to spend his Friday night. Besides, the art show Andi had been talking about lately was in town for the whole month. He’d have other opportunities to go.

“Okay then. It’s a date.”

Cyrus ducked his head with a small smile and tried to ignore the way his stomach twisted when TJ beamed cheerfully at him.

 

*******

 

It’s strange how quickly Cyrus became comfortable with TJ’s presence. He wasn’t used to making friends so fast, but it wasn’t long before he actually expected TJ to pop up in the hallways with a quick smile and greeting. The day of their practice date, TJ appeared by Cyrus’ locker between classes holding several sheets of folded up paper.

“Good morning,” He greeted him with that sweet smile. “I’ve got the new chapter for you if you still wanted to read it.”

“Definitely,” Cyrus grinned back and took the papers from him. He flipped them open, scanning over the first couple of lines, then groaned. 

TJ’s face fell. “What?”

Cyrus sighed, and tutted dramatically. “It’s just… I’m not going to be able to focus in class now, all I’ll be thinking about is reading this.”

He brightened again. It was nice to think Cyrus could make him look that happy. “Yeah?”

“Totally, I’m gonna flunk all my tests.”

“Well, maybe I should take these back, then,” TJ joked, reaching for the paper. Cyrus snatched them back and clutched them tightly to his chest, turning away defensively with a laugh.

“You’ll have to pry these pages from my cold dead hands if you want them back,” He said, then worried for a moment that he’d gone too far. “Unless you really want them back, obviously! It’s your writing.” 

TJ huffed out a laugh. “It’s fine, man. Honestly, it’s nice to have someone excited about my writing. I think you’re the only person to ever read my stuff.”

“Really? Well, I’m honoured.”

“You should be,” TJ leaned against the lockers. He looked so at ease with his cheeky smile. Cyrus felt a fleeting pang of jealousy that he obviously found it so easy to fit in at school. TJ was the kind of guy no one bothered and a lot of people liked. Cyrus wished he could be like that. He wished he could be cool. 

“Anyway,” TJ said. “We still on for our date tonight?”

Something in Cyrus twinged slightly at the word date. He couldn’t tell whether it was nerves or excited, but those were similar enough with him not to matter.

“Sure. Gives us an excuse to pretend our project doesn’t exist for a little bit.” They smiled at one another. 

“Great, I’ll pick you up at seven.”

“Where are we going?”

“It’s a surprise. You’ll like it though, I promise. I gotta go, catch you later.” And he turned and walked away. Cyrus watched him go, feeling extremely pleased with himself. He had no idea how they’d fallen so easily into being friends, but he was definitely enjoying it. For some reason, even though they hadn’t known each other all that long, Cyrus completely trusted TJ’s judgement. Spending time with him was becoming one of Cyrus’ favourite things lately, and he looked forward to seeing what he had planned for the evening. He was so distracted thinking about this that he didn’t realise that Andi, Jonah and Buffy were stood behind him until he turned around. His smile dropped right off his face when he saw the looks of shock on all of theirs. 

“What?” He asked, worriedly. “What’s wrong, did something happen? Did someone die?”

“Are you going on a _date_ with TJ Kippen?” Jonah asked, loudly.

The people milling around them stopped and stared. Cyrus blushed, and started down the hallway with the other three right behind him.

“It’s nothing, we’re just hanging out,” He explained as they walked. Jonah didn’t look like he believed him at all. 

“He’s picking you up to hang out? No way, he was totally hitting on you. What’re you doing agreeing to go on dates with TJ Kippen? That’s weird. That’s weird, right?” Jonah said, looking to Andi and Buffy for support.

Cyrus shot them pleading looks. He couldn’t exactly say “haha, no Jonah, it’s not a date it’s a practice date because TJ is showing me how to woo you!” Both girls’ eyes widened, and Andi just mumbled non-committedly before pretending to look at her phone. 

“We’ll see you guys later,” Buffy said, grabbing Andi’s arm and pulling her away. “At lunch! See you at lunch!”

Great. Thanks guys.

“It’s not a date. And even if it was, why would it matter?” Cyrus laughed nervously. “It’s just TJ.” 

“Just TJ? Didn’t he spend ages making Buffy’s life a living hell? He’s kind of a jerk! You can do better than that.”

Cyrus was caught between feeling pleased that Jonah obviously felt he should have higher standards when it came to dating and mildly annoyed on TJ’s behalf. Sure, TJ and Buffy had had their differences in the past, but they were mostly over them. Besides, TJ had never done anything personally to Cyrus, and he’d been nothing but nice since they started hanging out.

“TJ’s not a jerk,” Cyrus defended. “He’s sweet. He’s my friend.” 

“You’ve known him like a week,” Jonah pointed out flatly.

“Why does it matter?” Cyrus sighed, stopping outside his class. “He’s nice to me. We hang out. We’re friends. That stuff with Buffy was ages ago, they get on okay now. Also, he’s friends with Marty! You’ve never had a problem with Marty hanging out with him before!”

“Well, Marty doesn’t go on _dates_ with him.”

“You didn’t seem to have an issue with him being my history partner, why are you so bothered by this all of a sudden?” Cyrus felt he had a fair point here. Jonah was being a little overdramatic.

Jonah made a noise of annoyance. It was the most animated Cyrus had seen him in a while. “Look, I just don’t really like TJ, okay? I figured once you were done with this project you wouldn’t really talk to him anymore, that’s why I didn’t mind it. But dating? That’s different.”

They looked at one another for a moment.

“Why?” Cyrus asked. “Why don’t you like him?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Well, clearly it does if you’re getting this worked up about it.”

“No, it doesn’t-,” The bell rang and Jonah sighed, giving up and beginning to walk away. “You know what? It’s fine. Whatever, I’m going to be late to class. Have a good date.”

Cyrus tried not to feel hurt at Jonah ignored him calling after him. He resolved to find him later and talk about this, there was clearly something that Cyrus was missing. He hadn’t realised hanging out with TJ would cause such problems.

He spent the rest of the day waiting for his teachers to look away during class so he could slip TJ’s story out from under his books and read on. He had almost forgotten how much he liked his writing since reading the first few chapters, but these pages were an instant reminder. The detective and his sidekick had a fantastic relationship that had Cyrus actually envying them. He was even distracted by it through lunch, much to the chagrin of his friends.

“Cyrus, hey Cyrus.” A spoon suddenly appeared waving under his nose, startling him out of his reverie. He looked up to see Marty looking amused, and Buffy wearing her trademarked look of exasperation. 

“Sorry, what?” 

“We were just asking how your talk with Jonah went,” Said Marty. 

“Oh, that.” If Cyrus was honest he’d almost completely forgotten about he and Jonah’s almost-argument, TJ’s story having knocked it from his mind. “It was weird. He seems to really hate TJ, did you guys know he doesn’t like him?”

Buffy shrugged, but Marty nodded. “Yeah, they never really got along. Why do you think I never ask TJ to sit with us?”

“I thought that was because of me,” Buffy admitted.

“Well… it was at first,” Marty explained. “But you guys have been cool since you started tutoring him, right?”

“Wait,” Cyrus said to Buffy. “You tutor TJ? You never mentioned that.”

Buffy looked at Marty, unimpressed, and only refocused on Cyrus once he looked suitably chastened.

“Yes, in math, but we don’t talk about _that_ because TJ would _kill me_ if I told people, so don’t tell him you know that. He gets weird about it.”

Cyrus pondered this for a moment. TJ had no reason to tell Cyrus anything personal about himself, but he couldn’t help but feel a little hurt that he hadn’t mentioned it. After all, Buffy was Cyrus’ best friend. Maybe they could’ve been exchanging funny stories about her all this time. He shook himself. TJ getting tutored was none of his business anyway.

“So, do you know why they don’t get along?” He asked Marty. “Jonah didn’t say.”

Marty shrugged. “I don’t know, I mostly tune them out when either of them complains about the other."

“Wow, you’re so helpful,” Buffy said with a roll of her eyes. Marty grinned at her from around a spoonful of pudding. “Cyrus, maybe you should ask TJ about it during your _date_ tonight.”

“Date?” Marty asked, sitting up in interest. “You and TJ are going on a date?

Sometimes Cyrus wondered if his friends deliberately tried to make things difficult for him.

“It’s not a real date,” He sighed. “It’s a practise run. TJ thinks I should get used to dating, so things don’t go wrong when I go on my first date.”

“Hm, makes sense,” Marty said.

“Does it?” Buffy asked, then muttered to herself. “Boys are so stupid.”

It was then that Andi joined them, and she seemed to share Buffy’s sentiment.

“Jonah has been texting me all day,” She said to Cyrus, accusingly. “He keeps asking about you and TJ. He thinks you like him. What did you _say_ to him earlier?”

“I didn’t say anything!” Cyrus said. “I told him we were just hanging out, then he got all mad about it. Do you know why he doesn’t like TJ?”

“I have no idea,” Andi said. “He won’t tell me. Maybe you should ask TJ. I can’t believe you’re going out with him. You’re so different, what’re you guys even going to do tonight?”

Cyrus shrugged. “I don’t know, all he said was it was a surprise.”

“So it was his idea?” Buffy asked, curious.

“Yep.”

“Wow. So if you don’t know where you’re going, then how do you know what to wear?”

Oh, shoot.

 

*******

 

Several hours later, Cyrus found himself stood in his bedroom with Andi and Buffy in a total panic over his wardrobe. His usually clean room was covered discarded clothing. They have half an hour to go until TJ is meant to pick Cyrus up, and it’s a disaster. 

“You need to calm down,” Buffy says from where she’s sat on the bed watching Andi and Cyrus dig through his clothes. “It’s just TJ. Besides, it’s not even a real date. You said so yourself.” 

“It’s only polite to look your best,” Cyrus said, trying not to get swallowed by the dark recesses of his closet. “Even on a fake date.” 

“Also, if this is a practice run he should treat it like a real date,” Andi pointed out. She seemed to TJ’s idea was relatively reasonable, and had said earlier that she thought it would help make Cyrus less nervous in the future which was good for the rest of them because they wouldn’t have to deal with the second-hand stress of his first real date. “Jeez, Cy. You have like a thousand clothes. How have we not found an outfit yet? Where’s that blue shirt from earlier?”

“I don’t know, I think you threw it at Buffy earlier.” 

“Yup, here,” Buffy said, handing it over.

“Great.” Andi grabbed a pair of black jeans and the shirt and shoved them at Cyrus. “Try these.” 

“Won’t jeans be too casual?” 

Buffy groaned loudly. “Please don’t have the ‘too casual’ argument again, I can’t take it again. You’ve had this discussion _five_ times already. Jeans are not too casual alright, as long as your shirt is nice.”

“What if-” 

“The shirt isn’t _too nice,_ Cyrus.” 

“But-” 

“No buts! Go get dressed or you’ll never actually make it to your date. We still have to do your hair.”

“What’s wrong with my hair?!” 

“You’re so stressed out you’ve been running your hands through it, it looks like a bird’s nest,” Andi pointed out.

At that point, Cyrus decided to give up and let the girls run the show. He let Andi shove him into the bathroom to change, and then just sat on the edge of the bed and let the two of them mess with his hair until they looked satisfied with it. He decided it was best not to look in a mirror anytime soon, and save himself from rethinking the entire look and having to start over. He was, however, launched into a fresh new wave of panic when the window was momentarily illuminated by a set of headlights outside. Buffy pulled the curtains to the side and peered outside in delight.

“TJ’s here!” She said. “He has a car. Did you know he had a car?”

“For some reason, I just assumed he could just materialise places, like a ghost. Or a demon,” Said Andi thoughtfully, joining Buffy by the window. Cyrus usually would have spied with them but at this point he was too busy trying not to work himself up into a panic-sweat.

“Do I look okay?” He asked, for the thousandth time. He was struck suddenly by just how much he wanted to impress TJ, and he had no idea why. There was no reason for him to be bothered by how TJ saw him, in fact, TJ had seen him enough times already by now to work out there was nothing actually all that impressive about him. One evening in a nice shirt with styled hair was certainly not going to change that, so why did Cyrus care all of a sudden? He perched on the bed and stared up at the ceiling, willing himself to breathe while he waited for the doorbell to ring.

The girls were too busy watching TJ walk up the driveway to take much notice of Cyrus’ crisis.

“It’s a nice car too,” Buffy was saying. “Do you think it’s actually his?”

“No way,” Andi said. “He had to have borrowed it from someone. There’s no way a high schooler could afford _that._ ”

Even though he’d been expecting it, the ring of the doorbell made Cyrus jump up as if he’d received a sudden electric shock. He looked at Buffy and Andi, wide-eyed.

“What do I do?” He asked.

They both sighed and shoved him towards the door.

“Go let him in and put some shoes on,” Buffy said, ever the voice of common sense. “Jeez, it’s a good thing this ‘isn’t a real date’, TJ was right you do need the practice.” 

“Just breathe,” Andi said. “It’s only TJ.”

“Right,” Cyrus nodded firmly and squared his shoulders. “It’s only TJ.” And with that he marched himself downstairs, leaving the girls to spy on them from his bedroom window.

His whole nervous system felt like it was on the brink of a shutdown. However, when he opened the door all worries flew from his mind. In fact, his mind was wiped entirely all of sudden, and he could do little else but gape because there stood TJ, tall, terrifying TJ, looking even more amazing than usual. Cyrus had never seen TJ dressed up before, and while he had become used to him looking great even in a simple out of jeans and a hoodie this was something else entirely. His legs looked longer than normal somehow, and he wore a soft grey henley shirt that almost seemed to cling to him under a sleek leather jacket. It was like he’d stepped right out of a magazine, or out from a movie screen, and Cyrus was at a loss for words. 

“Wow,” TJ greeted him. “You look great.”

Cyrus took a brief moment to restart his brain, snapping his eyes back up to look TJ in the eye. TJ’s usual neatly combed hair had been carefully mussed, giving him a sweet just-rolled-out-of-bed look that didn’t exactly helpful Cyrus regain all of his faculties.

“Um, thanks,” He replied, trying not to swallow his tongue. He laughed nervously. “Ditto.”

TJ smiled widely at him. Was it getting warm in here, Cyrus wondered to himself. No, of course not. TJ could not, in fact, control the temperature, no matter how hot he was. He needed to calm down.

“That’s lesson number one,” TJ said.

“What?”

“Always greet your date with a compliment.”

Oh. Oh right, this was a lesson. Because TJ was teaching him how not to make a fool of himself in front of his crush. TJ was just helping him out. This wasn’t a real date, he had no reason to be nervous.

“You ready to go?” TJ asked.

“Uh, yeah. Right, one sec. I’ve just gotta grab my shoes. Come in, I’ll be two seconds.”

TJ stepped inside, and Cyrus took a moment to marvel at the sight of him in his house. He had never expected to play host to TJ Kippen, captain of the basketball team, even if it was just for a couple of minutes while he got ready to leave. Cyrus needed to stop overthinking it, he was making himself even more anxious, so he forced himself to look away and quickly booked it back upstairs. Buffy and Andi were scrambling away from his bedroom door as he reached it.

“It’s a good thing neither of you are planning a career in espionage,” Cyrus said, drily. “Because you’re terrible spies.”

In response, Buffy launched a jacket and a pair of shoes at him.

“Hey!”

“Put those on and get back downstairs,” she said.

He did what he was told, a little grudgingly, but without complaint mostly because he didn’t want to be rude and keep TJ waiting too long.

“Be safe!” Andi called after him, as he hurried back down the stairs. He ignored her and tried to focus on not coming across as a complete mess.

TJ was lingering in the hall and, oh God… he was looking at the baby pictures of Cyrus hung on the wall. He turned when he heard Cyrus approaching. “Cute,” He said with a smirk. Cyrus elected to ignore this, on the basis that he already had everything else about his existence to worry about and adding baby pictures on top of that might actually give him a nervous breakdown.

“My parents are all very proud of me. Anyways, I’m ready to go!” He let TJ herd him out the door.

He was forced to stop in his tracks yet again, however, when he spotted the car parked outside. It was an old silvery-blue convertible that looked like it had been rolled right out of a movie from the 1950s. Andi had been right, it definitely didn’t look like something that should belong to a seventeen-year-old. 

“Is this yours?” He asked in amazement.

TJ laughed, clearly delighted by the reaction, then scratched the back of his neck nervously. “Nah, it’s my dad’s. He let me borrow it for tonight. It’s a Mustang,” he said it proudly like he couldn’t believe he’d been trusted with the car either.

“If any of my parents had a car like this I’d never be allowed anywhere near it,” Cyrus said, walking over to admire it. “I’m a walking disaster… but don’t worry, I’ll be careful around this!”

 “I know you will. C’mon, get in. We got places to be.”


	5. Five

It wasn’t as cold as Cyrus thought it was going to be in the car, or at least if it was he wasn’t focused on it. He was too busy trying not to jiggle his leg and forcing himself not to stare at TJ the entire time. He watched as TJ turned a knob on the dashboard and the old radio crackled to life, tuning into some terrible local country station, and tried to think of something interesting to say. Sadly, his mind had gone pretty blank since TJ’s arrival, and the pressure of needing conversation just drove any topics further from his brain.

“You okay?” TJ asked, glancing at him with a concerned frown. “You’re quiet tonight.”

“I’m fine,” Cyrus said. “Great actually. Just… taking it all in. Where are we going?”

The world rolled by them in a haze of glowing orange street lamps and dark blurry treelines. Sitting here together in the dark as TJ smiled at him felt a thousand times more intimate than it ever should have. Cyrus was in unfamiliar territory, and he was not good at navigation.

“I told you, it’s a surprise. How’s your day been?”

“Nerve-wracking,” Cyrus replied, without really thinking about it. He didn’t think TJ would mind him being honest. “Turns out even fake dates are stressful, though I guess everything is stressful for me. Andi said it was probably actually a good idea to do this, saves her and Buffy from putting up with a meltdown if I ever actually go out with someone.”

TJ snorted. “Yeah, I saw her and Buffy in the window. Do they know they’re not as sneaky as they think they are?”

“Yeah,” Cyrus laughed. He was beginning to feel much more at ease now, unsure of why he’d been so worried. “Neither of them are exactly James Bond material.” 

“You like the Bond movies?” TJ asked.

Cyrus bit his lip and admitted, “I’ve only seen one. Casino Royale.”

TJ groaned loudly. “That’s tragic. Okay, we’re having a movie day at some point, we can marathon them. The old ones are the  _ best. _ ”

“You want to hang out with me?” The words fell from Cyrus’ mouth in surprise before he could stop them. TJ looked at him as if to say ‘duh’.

“We’re hanging out right now,” TJ pointed out. “And it was  _ my _ idea.”

Cyrus realised then that at some point over the last week and a bit he had managed to convince himself that TJ was only doing this to be nice and because they were working together in class. He hadn’t realised that his own feelings of friendship were being reciprocated. He pondered over this for the remainder of the drive, looking on fondly as TJ sung along cheerfully with the terrible songs on the radio. 

 

*******

TJ was right, Cyrus did like his surprise. When they finally rolled into their destination he lit up like a child on Christmas morning. They were surrounded by rows and rows of carefully parked cars, a busy hum of happy chatter filling the air of the open field, and a stage with a large projection screen had been set up towards the front.

“I didn’t know drive-in theatres even still existed,” He said, as TJ pulled in. He looked pleased with himself, Cyrus noted, like making Cyrus smile was a special achievement. “This is awesome.”

“Right? They do this every month. My mom used to bring me here as a kid when she wanted to get out of the house, it was my favourite. This is actually where I was introduced to the Bond movies. They do marathons sometimes.” 

“So what are we watching tonight?” Cyrus asked, flooded with anticipation. He’d always wanted to go to a drive-in movie theatre - there was something romantic about the idea. It reminded him of classic movies and old songs. 

“Wait and see. It should be starting any minute now.”

As if to prove his point further, no sooner than TJ had spoken did a picture flickered to life on the screen. The field went blissfully quiet around them, and then the music started. It was Harry Potter.

Cyrus twisted around in his seat to stare at TJ. “How did you know I like Harry Potter?” He demanded.

TJ shrugged that pleased look back on his face once again. “You seemed like the type… also, I saw the Hufflepuff sticker you have on your notebook when we were studying. Oh! And...” He leaned over to the back seat suddenly, only to pull out a small picnic basket and place it gently between them. He flipped open the lid, and Cyrus peered inside. He looked back up at TJ in wonder.

“Marry me,” He said. TJ laughed.

Inside the basket was a container full of baby taters. Cyrus’ eyes had zeroed in on them without even taking notice of the slices of pizza and boxes of fries next to them. 

“Marty was right,” Cyrus said, once they were settled with their food and facing the screen once again. “You are good at this. You planned like… the perfect date, and you’ve known me less than a month.”

“It’s all about noticing the little things,” TJ said. “You gotta tailor your dates to the individual. That’s lesson number two. The more interested your date is in what you’re doing on the date, the more interested they’ll be in you. It tells them that you’ve been paying attention.”

“You’re so good at this. How are you so good at this?”

TJ flashed him a smile. “Practice. It’s easier than you think. You could do it too.”

“I don’t know about that. I’m good at planning, but romance? Not so much.”

“Oh, c’mon. You’re being too hard on yourself. Think about it, if you wanted to take me somewhere you knew I’d like where would it be?”

Cyrus thought about it for a moment. “I’d take you to laser tag.”

“Laser tag?”

“Yep, laser tag and then out for milkshakes after. You seem like a laser tag sort of person.”

“That does actually sound like a pretty cool date,” TJ mused. “See, you’re getting the hang of this already.”

The rest of the evening flew by, and Cyrus had such a good time that he forgot about any of the things he was worried about in the first place. In between bites of food, TJ kept up a running commentary of the film that made Cyrus laugh so hard that the neighbouring cars shushed them and his ribs started to hurt from it. During the intermission, TJ dug out a bag of popcorn from the gearbox, and the two of them spent the next fifteen minutes throwing pieces at one another attempting to catch them in their mouths. 

At the end of the night, TJ dropped him off and walked him up to the front door. His bedroom lights were blissfully dark, so Cyrus reckoned he was safe from Andi and Buffy’s interrogation at least until tomorrow morning. 

“I had a good time tonight,” He said, turning to TJ. Oh, he hadn’t realised how close they were standing. He was struck once again by how nice his eyes were up close, bright and framed by elegant long lashes. Cyrus swallowed.

“Me too,” Said TJ. “You’re a sweet date, Goodman.”

“Y-you too.”

TJ took a step closer to him, and it suddenly felt like the world had narrowed down to just the two of them.

“Lesson number three,” TJ murmured, his eyes flicking down to Cyrus’ lips. “This is where you’d kiss your date.”

Cyrus closed his eyes in anticipation as TJ leaned forward, but the kiss he was expecting never came. Instead, there was a slight pressure on his cheek, and he opened his eyes to see TJ pulling his thumb back and holding it up for him to inspect.

“You had an eyelash,” he said. “Make a wish.”

Cyrus let out a breath he didn’t realise he’d been holding and smiled. He blew the eyelash from TJ’s finger gently. “Thanks, TJ… for everything.”

“It’s no biggie,” Said TJ, stepping back. “I like spending time with you. Glad you had fun, I’ll see you later.”

“Yeah, later.”

This time when TJ walked away, the sinking feeling of disappointment was almost difficult to ignore. He tried not to dwell on this, deciding to put all thoughts of TJ out of his mind for now. This was more challenging than he’d anticipated, though, especially as only half an hour later his phone rang and he pulled it from his pocket to see TJ’s caller ID flashing up on the screen.

“Hello?”

“Okay, I know I only just dropped you off,” TJ greeted, “but I just realised you never told me what you thought of my new chapter.”

“Oh,” Cyrus smiled to himself and settled back on his bed. “Well, it was excellent, as expected.”

“What did you like best about it?”

“The whole thing,” Cyrus said, and then launched into a detailed ramble about his favourite parts so far.

 

*******

 

“So how was your not-date date,” Andi asked in lieu of a greeting the next day.

“It was good,” Cyrus said, and then ignored her knowing look in favour of a subject change.

 

*******

 

The theme of the month seemed to be ‘surprises’, Cyrus noted on Sunday night when he was awoken by a strange jingling sound. It wasn’t that late, but it was late enough for his parents have gone to bed already and all the lights to be off. Cyrus had fallen asleep on top of his homework without even managing to get under the covers first, the exhaustion of the week finally setting in and beating his insomnia. When he first heard the jingling he was still bleary-eyed and out of it wondering if he was hearing things but then it came again loud and insistent and he realised it was his phone ringing. He scrambled to retrieve it from where it had slipped down the side of his bed and swiped it open without even checking the caller ID.

“Hello?” He said, voice rough with sleep.

“Oh hey,” Came TJ’s voice, floating gently from the speaker. “Did I wake you up?”

“No,” Cyrus lied through a yawn. TJ obviously called his bluff because he apologised sheepishly. “It’s fine, what’s up?”

“I’ve got a new chapter for you.”

At that Cyrus sat up, suddenly wide awake. “That was fast,” He said.

“I was inspired,” Said TJ. “You inspired me. I’ve basically been writing non-stop since Friday night.” 

Cyrus’ heart jumped strangely at the idea of being TJ’s inspiration to write. 

“You’re writing because of me?”

“Yeah, I think you must be a lucky charm or something. You give me new ideas every time I see you.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah, so… speaking of seeing you, are you busy after school tomorrow?”

“I am,” Cyrus sighed, he was actually kind of disappointed. “I promised I’d go to Andi’s mom’s final wedding dress fitting. We’re all going.”

“You’re pretty close with Andi’s folks, huh?”

“Yeah, Bex is awesome. She’s kind of more like an older sister than a moment. Plus, she always buys us pizza. We’re helping her plan the wedding too.”

“That’s cool, when is it?”

“Next month.”

“Wow, that’s soon.”

“Yeah.” It was then that Cyrus was hit by a genius idea. “Hey, you wanna be my date? If I can get an RSVP ASAP I might just be able to get you in. You could help me fend off all the old people that like to ask if I’ve got a girlfriend yet?”

Truth be told, Bex would probably be thrilled that Cyrus was making more friends. 


	6. Six

Stepping out into Bex and Bowie’s wedding was like stepping into a fairytale. It was being held at sunset in the backyard of the house Andi and Bex had both grown up in, but it didn’t look like much of a backyard anymore… it looked more like a strange kind of paradise. The fairy lights that were usually strung across the yard had multiplied by the hundred and lit candles lined the edges of a petal-covered aisle that led to a breathtaking arch of flowers. White chairs in neat rows were set up on each side of the aisle, and the whole place was bathed in a mystical glow.

“Wow,” Cyrus said to Andi. “You guys did a great job setting up.”

“I know right,” Said Andi, looking incredibly happy. “Even Cece likes it.” 

Cece, Andi’s grandmother, had put up a fight over hosting the wedding in a garden. She had felt the occasion deserved to be celebrated with a little more grandeur, but Bex and Bowie had always been a simple couple and they wanted a simple wedding. Something intimate, just family and close friends, something just for them. Looking around, Cyrus couldn’t help but think they’d definitely made the right decision.

“You did a great job, babe,” Amber said, walking over and sliding an arm around Andi’s waist. Andi melted into her touch, and Cyrus felt a quick pang of envy. He wished he had what they had. “Speaking of babes… where’s your date, Cyrus? Andi said you were bringing TJ Kippen.”

Amber waggled her eyebrows suggestively at him. Even though she was older than them, apparently TJ had gained a reputation with her classmates too. The high school rumour mill was never accurate but it spanned the entire school. Cyrus ignored it most of the time.

“He’s on his way. He had to work earlier, so he said he’d meet me here.”

“So are you guys like a thing now? You guys have been hanging out a lot right?”

“We’re just friends,” Cyrus sighed. He was getting a little bored of having to reiterate that fact. “He’s helping me with some stuff.”

“Ah, right, the dating lessons,” Amber said, nodding sagely. “Andi told me. Oh yeah, you’re definitely just friends. Nothing romantic about going on dates at all. Boys are so obtuse.”

“What are you implying?” 

Andi cleared her throat loudly all of a sudden, then wave towards the house. “Oh hey, TJ!” She called. 

Cyrus turned, and it felt like the breath had been knocked right out him. The sight of TJ in a suit was one he certainly hadn’t been prepared for. He had known, in theory, that he was going to see TJ in a suit - it was a wedding after all - but he hadn’t really thought too much about it. He probably should have, maybe if he had he wouldn’t be having the reaction to it that he was.

“Hey guys,” TJ greeted them brightly as he walked across the deck to meet them. “Hey Andi, thanks for the invite.”

“Oh, that was all Cyrus,” Andi said. “Not that you’re not welcome here-”

“Hi, I’m Amber,” Amber stuck her hand out for TJ, a devious smile on her face. Cyrus didn’t like it even a little bit. “You’re TJ, right? I’ve heard _so much_ about you.”

“You have?” TJ asked.

“Oh! I think I hear Bex calling me,” Andi said. “Come on, she probably needs our help.”

“But I didn’t hear anything,” Said Amber stubbornly even as she let Andi tug her away. “Bye TJ!”

They watched the girls go, furiously whispering to one another and glancing back occasionally as they headed for the house. TJ looked amused as he turned back to look at Cyrus.

“Are all your friends a little bit crazy?” He asked. 

“How else would they put up with me?” Cyrus joked. “Thanks for coming, by the way. You look really nice.” 

“Thanks, you look nice too, as usual.”

Cyrus blushed and looked at his feet. “Maybe we should go sit down? I think they’re starting soon.” 

“Sure, lead the way.” 

They sat and were soon joined by Walker, an artist friend of Andi’s who sometimes hung out with them when he wasn’t working. Cyrus had originally met him at his own Bar Mitzvah, which Walker had been working at drawing caricatures of the guests. He greeted Cyrus with a tight hug and introduced himself to TJ, raising his eyebrows and shooting Cyrus an unreadable look when he realised who he was. 

“TJ, huh? I’ve heard Buffy talk about you. You’re friends with Marty, right?” 

“Yeah, we’re on the basketball team together.”

“That’s cool,” Walker nodded, then gestured to the two of them. “Are you two…?”

“No,” Cyrus said, maybe too quickly if the way Walker’s eyebrows shot up was anything to go by, but he didn’t have time to explain further because the music started and the guests fell into silence as the ceremony began.

The ceremony was beautiful, Cyrus definitely cried. Bex looked absolutely radiant in her dress, and as she walked down the aisle towards Bowie they both wore matching looks of joy. One day Cyrus was going to find somebody to marry that he loved as much as Bex and Bowie loved one another, and that person would love him just as much in return. He couldn’t wait. As he dabbed his eyes during the vows, TJ glanced over with a smile and reached over to squeeze Cyrus’ hand. Cyrus squeezed back softly. He didn’t let go until it was over. Afterwards, they helped move the chairs out the way so tables and a dancefloor could be set up.

“You know, hand-holding _can_ be platonic, but usually when you’re holding hands with your wedding date it’s not,” Amber had a nasty habit of appearing out of nowhere and making Cyrus jump. At least she’d waited until TJ had gone to the bathroom to pounce this time.  

“He was just being nice,” Cyrus said, fixing her with a stern look. “Now, will you drop this?” 

“Hm, okay, if you say so…” Amber said, taking a long sip of her drink. “But you know Jonah was watching you guys the whole time right? If your aim is to make him jealous, I’d say it’s definitely working.” 

“What? Really?” Cyrus frowned. “You think he was jealous.”

Amber nodded solemnly. “Oh, for sure. You should try dancing with TJ, maybe you’ll see what I mean.”

Something about the idea of dancing with TJ just to see if it would make Jonah jealous didn’t feel quite right, but Cyrus just nodded anyway. 

“Anyway, your boy’s coming back and I’ve gotta save Andi from her relatives. See ya later skater,” Amber patted him jauntily on the arm, then left.

“She’s kind of scary,” TJ said, sitting down beside Cyrus.

“You should’ve met her before she and Andi got together,” Cyrus said. “It was so much worse. You know she once almost got Andi arrested?”

TJ raised his eyebrows disbelievingly. “Really?”

“Yup. Don’t worry, she’s a lot nicer now. She’s better at dealing with her feelings. Sometimes she gives us free food at The Spoon.”

“Speaking of feelings,” TJ said, and for a moment Cyrus held his breath unsure of what he was going to say. “You boy’s been looking at us all night.” 

Oh. He wasn’t sure why he was disappointed or what he’d expected TJ to say, but it wasn’t that. He turned to look in the direction TJ was gesturing to. Two tables away sat Jonah. He was with Libby, an ex-girlfriend of his from middle school who had become close friends with Andi, nodding along while she signed quickly at him. After a couple of seconds, he glanced in their direction and quickly looked away again.

“Are you guys sure you’re not dating?” Cyrus’ head snapped back around to see Walker peering at them in amusement. He had been sat on the opposite side of the table talking to Buffy for the past half an hour, but the two of them were now watching Cyrus and TJ like they were some kind of entertaining skit being performed just for them. 

“Definitely,” TJ said. “I’m just the arm candy. Here for moral support.” 

This startled a laugh out of Cyrus. He couldn’t help but grin as he said, “he’s saving me from all the adults who like to ask if I have a girlfriend yet.” 

Buffy rolled her eyes at the two of them. “Boys,” She said, in that exasperated tone of hers.

“C’mon,” TJ said, patting Cyrus’ arm. “Let’s go dance before anyone starts asking you about your future.” 

It wasn’t until they were on the dance floor and the song switched from the hip-shaking pop tune that had previously been playing to something slow and sweet that Cyrus realised what a mistake agreeing to dance might have been. He was not a good dancer, he was clumsy with the tendency to step on feet and end up looking foolish, but TJ didn’t seem to mind this as he pulled him in close. 

“This is a bad idea,” Cyrus said, as TJ took his hand. 

“Why’s that?” TJ asked. 

“I can’t dance. You know the saying ‘two left feet’? Well, that was created to describe me.” 

TJ’s breath tickled Cyrus’ cheek and ear as he huffed out a soft laugh. “Anyone ever tell you that you should be a comedian?” 

“My mom once said that, but I think she was calling me a smart-ass.” 

“You are a smart-ass. It’s kind of annoying how you’re right all the time.” 

“Wow, thanks.” 

“It’s okay, you’re my favourite smart-ass. It’s endearing.” 

Cyrus smiled to himself and tucked his head under TJ’s chin, resting against his chest as they swayed gently to the music. The night felt a little bit like magic at that moment, as if the rest of the world had faded away and it was just him and TJ dancing alone bathed in the glow of candles as fireflies twinkled in the warm summer air around them. 

“You wanna get out of here?” TJ asked after a little while. 

“What, like sneak out of the wedding?”

“I mean… the wedding’s technically over. People will be leaving soon anyway… it’s a nice night out, I know a nice place we could go?” 

Cyrus thought about, looking around at the rest of the party. It wasn’t anywhere near over, but knowing Bex and Bowie they planned for it to go on all night. Even without TJ here Cyrus probably would’ve ended up passing out before it was completely over. The adults were all pretty drunk anyway, no one would notice him slipping out early. 

“Okay,” He said, finally.

 

*******

 

The night air is warm and stars glitter in the sky above them when Cyrus and TJ find themselves sat on the swings in the local park. It’s almost one in the morning, and they’ve been talking for close to two hours now, but it doesn’t feel like any time has gone by at all since they left the wedding behind. TJ has just finished telling Cyrus an anecdote about his short stint in a small mall jail after wreaking havoc in the food court with his friends when Cyrus works up the courage to ask something that’s been bothering him for a while.

“So… why does Jonah hate you so much, anyway?”

TJ frowned and kicked at the woodchips beneath his feet, swaying back and forth lazily. “I don’t know really… I once told him that Ultimate Frisbee wasn’t a real sport, so that might be it.”

Cyrus fixed him with a stern look and TJ sighed.

“Fine, alright. To tell you the truth it could be for like a bunch of reasons. I wasn’t a very nice guy in middle school, Buffy can tell you that much. Jonah was pretty popular with everybody, and I was kind of jealous of him. We got into a fight once.”

“A fight? Like an actual serious fist fight?” Cyrus couldn’t imagine Jonah fighting with anyone, and he’d certainly never heard about this one.

TJ nodded. “Like an actual serious fist fight.”

“...Who won?”

TJ was clearly fighting back a smirk. “I put him in a trash can, so… me I guess.”

Cyrus gaped at him.

“Don’t look at me like that, he threw the first punch. It was dumb, I can’t even remember what it was over.”

“No wonder you guys don’t get along,” Said Cyrus. “Did you ever apologise?” 

“Nope. And I don’t plan to, so don’t try and make me.” 

Cyrus looked away guiltily. He had already been plotting ways to get Jonah and TJ to make up.

“I just think you guys could be friends if you gave him a chance,” He said.

“Look, I appreciate you trying, but I don’t think we’re ever going to get along. We’re too different. Our personalities totally clash, plus he totally hates me and you hanging out.” 

Cyrus bit his lip. “...He does seem kind of mad about it, doesn’t he?” 

“Yup,” TJ’s expression drops a little, some of the humour from earlier fading away and Cyrus didn’t know why. “Looks like your plan to get his attention is working.”

“What? Oh, that. Yeah.” 

At that, the conversation petered out and they swung in silence for a few minutes while Cyrus mulled things over. TJ was the one to finally break through the quiet. “You know, I haven’t been on a swing in ages,” he said. 

“Really?” Cyrus asked, surprised. He came to the swings a lot, especially when he was feeling bad about himself… which was pretty much all the time. He told TJ as much, and the other boy smiled at him fondly. 

“You’re too hard on yourself, you know that?” 

Cyrus shrugged. “It’s hard not to focus on my mistakes sometimes. Swinging helps. What about you? What do you do when you’re feeling bad?” 

TJ went quiet for a moment, thinking his answer over, and then he something that Cyrus would never had expected in a million years. “Well… lately, I haven’t felt bad at all. Or at least, when I start feeling bad I’ve stopped pretty quickly, ‘cause I can just pick up my phone and text you.” 

Cyrus didn’t know what to say, he just stared at him.

“Is that weird?” TJ said, looking away awkwardly.

“No! No, it’s not.” Cyrus reached out his foot to tap it against TJ’s reassuringly. “Everyone should have a friend to take their mind off things. I’m glad I can be that for you.” 

They smiled at one another, and then TJ kicked him gently, bumping their feet together and briefly tangling them together… as if they were sat playing footsie.

“I’m glad you came to me for help,” TJ admitted quietly. “I can’t remember what it was like without you in my life. Did you know you’re the only person I can talk to like this?”

Cyrus knew exactly what he meant. Buffy and Andi would always be his best friends, they knew him so well that they could practically read his mind. They knew when he needed comfort or support, and they were always willing to give it, but with long-term friendship came certain topics that were more difficult to talk about. Things with TJ were different, Cyrus felt like he could tell him anything and TJ would never judge him for it. Things with TJ were special. 

“You want a push?” 

“No thank you.” 

"Hm, too bad,” TJ grinned and slid off his swing to get up and push Cyrus. He pushed him until he was high enough that he wasn’t sure if he was screaming or laughing anymore, but it was exhilarating. It was difficult to ever be around TJ and not find himself having a great time.

 

*******

 

The next morning Cyrus woke to the odd sensation of something tickling his nose and a crick in his neck. He opened his eyes only to immediately squeeze them shut again, the bright light from the sun was practically blinding. It took him a moment to parse where he was, and then he realised. The last thing he could remember from last night had been lying down on the ground with TJ, the two of them looking up at the stars while Cyrus pointed out different constellations and yammered on about astronomy. Instead of getting bored like his friends usually did, TJ had listened attentively and asked questions. Cyrus couldn’t remember the conversation ever ending, so they must’ve fallen asleep.

Usually, the prospect of waking up on the ground of a public park would unsettle - and most likely panic - Cyrus, but the reassuring warmth of an arm that was not his slung across him and a chest pressed up against his back prevented him from totally losing it. Instead, he lay there trying to decide whether he should focus more on the fact his parents were probably going to kill him for not coming home without texting them or on the way it felt to wake up in TJ’s arms. The right answer was probably the first one, but he could not ignore the latter if he tried. It wasn’t much longer before the sounds of the early rising birds and the distant sounds of cars on their way to work stirred TJ too, and Cyrus rolled over to look at him.

“Morning,” TJ yawned blearily. He seemed less confused by their surroundings than Cyrus had, but he was generally less confused than Cyrus anyway. Still, they were in a park.

“We’re in a park,” Said Cyrus, trying to remove his focus from how cute TJ was after just waking up. The sunrise illuminated his face, and the light glowed behind him shining through his hair and making it look as if he had a halo.   

“Nice observation, detective,” TJ teased. “What time is it?”

He leaned over Cyrus to reach for the phone in his jacket pocket, bringing their faces close together as he did so. Cyrus stared up at him. Those eyes again - they really were becoming a problem.

“Hey,” Said TJ, appearing to forget about his phone. Cyrus let his eyes flicker down to TJ’s mouth, and when he looked back up to meet his gaze he was looking at him expectantly. TJ licked his lips slightly, appearing to make a decision, and then-

 **_BRRRRRING!_ ** 

The moment was broken. Cyrus sat up abruptly, all but knocking TJ off him in the process, and scrambled to grab his own phone and answer it. 

“Sorry, sorry,” He said to TJ. “It’s probably my mom.” 

It was not his mom. It was Jonah.

“Where the hell are you?” Jonah demanded when Cyrus answered. “Your parents are flipping out. You didn’t come home last night?”

And just like that, the peace of the morning had entirely disappeared.


	7. Seven

“I can’t believe you got yourself grounded,” Andi complained from where she was sprawled across Cyrus’ bedroom floor dramatically. “You do realise Bex and Bowie leave for their honeymoon tomorrow right? I have the house to myself for an entire week. I was gonna make you guys come over for a game night.”

Marty snorted. “A game night? That’s what you’d do with an empty house? What about a party?”

“No way,” Said Andi. “Not after last time.” 

They all winced. Last time Andi had thrown a party, Amber had managed to invite a good chunk of the seniors. It had been cool for approximately five minutes, and then everything had gone to hell. It ended with the neighbours calling the police. Andi had been grounded for a month, and frankly, it was a miracle that it hadn’t been longer.

“I’m still amazed that your parents actually grounded you. What is this, like, the first time you’ve ever actually gotten in this much trouble?” Buffy said. 

Cyrus nodded. “You think getting in trouble with one set of parents is bad? Try two. I’m grounded in both houses,” he sighed. “I don’t really blame them though, I shouldn’t have stayed out and worried them like that.” 

“It’s so weird to see you breaking rules,” Marty said, looking at Cyrus thoughtfully. “Maybe my mom’s right about TJ being a bad influence.” 

“If you’re grounded, are we even meant to be here?”

Cyrus shrugged. “I don’t think my parents really know how to do the whole big punishment thing. They’re not used to it.”

“Did you even tell them who you were out with?” Andi asked. 

“No way. I told them I went for a walk and fell asleep. It’s technically true. I didn’t want them to think badly of TJ.” He’d felt kind of bad lying to his parents, but telling them that and getting grounded was better than telling them he had been out with a boy and then getting grounded _and_ interrogated. 

At that, Buffy and Andi exchanged looks of clear concern while Marty tapped out a text on his phone perfectly obliviously. 

Cyrus sighed. “What is it?” 

Andi sat up. They both looked at him, faces sympathetic. 

“Cyrus, you do remember that TJ’s straight… right?” Andi asked. 

His brow furrowed. “Of course I do,” he said. “Why wouldn’t I?” 

“Well, it’s just that…” They looked at each other again. “It’s just…”

“We’re worried you might be falling for him,” Buffy said gently. “We don’t want you to get hurt is all.” 

“Ha! Me falling for TJ? No way!” Even to his own ears, Cyrus didn’t sound believable, but he pressed on. “I like Jonah, remember? The whole point of getting to know TJ was so I could learn how to show Jonah I’m into him! This was your idea!” 

Cyrus thought about it later when his friends had gone home and he was lying in bed. Was it possible that he had fallen for TJ without realising? Well… he did have nice eyes, and a nice laugh, and pretty nice arms… but! No! This was ridiculous. He wasn’t into TJ. He was into Jonah. Jonah, sweet oblivious Jonah, who he’d been crushing on since middle school. Jonah who had recently come out as bi, giving Cyrus hope for a chance he never thought he’d have! Jonah! 

Though, if he was honest with himself, he did think TJ was moving in to kiss him the other morning. And the night he had dropped him home from their fake date his heart had thudded wildly at the thought of TJ’s lips on his own. That was ridiculous though, TJ would never kiss him. TJ was a basketball playing, weight lifting, girl charming, straight jock. He wouldn’t even think about kissing Cyrus. There was no way. Wow. Cyrus really needed to refocus. He’d become distracted from his original goal, all caught up in the whirlwind of making a new _friend_. Well, he decided, he had been pining for Jonah long enough, maybe now was the time to finally make a move.

 

*******

 

Cyrus got his chance to make a move the very next morning. He spotted Jonah in the hallway before class, rummaging through his locker half-heartedly. He steeled himself and took a deep breath, then marched right up to him.

“Good morning, Mr Beck,” Oh, too formal, _too formal!_

Luckily Jonah didn’t seem to notice anything weird about Cyrus’ greeting, he just turned and gave him an easy smile. “Hey Cyrus, what’s up?”

“Oh, nothing much,” Cyrus replied, casually. Be confident. Be cool. Be cool, Cyrus. “Just here. At school. For my ed-u-cation.”

Jonah gave him an odd look. Crap. This was a lot harder than he’d thought. 

“You feeling okay?”

“Yeah, sorry, I’m fine.”

“Good, ‘cause we were all worried about you the other night,” Said Jonah. “It’s not like you to stay out all night. I hope your parents didn’t go too hard on you.” 

“Well, they grounded me, but I think they forgot about it… they’re not used to having to punish me.” 

“You’re so lucky,” Jonah said, enviously. “My parents might not listen to me, but they’d definitely notice if I didn’t come home. I’d be grounded for like life if I’d done that. Your parents are totally cool.” 

Oh good, a segue. “Speaking of totally cool…” Cyrus said, trying to appear calm and collected. He had the distinct impression he was not succeeding at this, but he pressed on nonetheless. He rummaged through his bag, and finally managed to pull out the flyer he’d stowed away in there. “The art gallery downtown is having a big music exhibition this weekend. It’s got all these instruments that belonged to famous artists and bands. You wanna go with me? It looks like it could be pretty fun. Maybe we could grab dinner after?”

Jonah took the flyer and examined it with a pleased smile. “Yeah, I heard about this. It sounds awesome. I’d love to go!”

Cyrus could swear his heart skipped a beat. “Really?”

“Sure!”

“That’s great. Fantastic…” But before he could say anything else, the bell rang and Jonah gave him a fist bump before leaving for class. Cyrus waited until he was out of sight before doing a happy dance.

 

*******

 

TJ caught up to Cyrus after school. They had a library session planned. Though they’d handed in their history assignment a couple of weeks ago, they’d taken to studying together a lot. It was nice to have a study partner who didn’t get distracted like Buffy or turn homework into crafts like Andi when she got bored. Cyrus had actually started looking forward to their sessions, and it was kind of hard to look forward to homework no matter how much he liked learning. 

“So you _are_ alive,” He said, nudging Cyrus gently with his shoulder. “Marty made it sound like your parents had actually killed you.”

Cyrus beamed at him. “Nope, still here. The Grim Reaper decided he didn’t want me. Guess you’re stuck with me.”

“There’s no one else I’d rather be stuck with,” TJ grinned. “So you’re in a really good mood. You know I had to run to catch up to you, you were practically skipping.”

“Oh, well you know. It was a good day at school. I sure do love learning,” Cyrus joked back.

“Nerd,” TJ nudged him again playfully, and Cyrus nudged back. This quickly devolved into a shoving war and ended with Cyrus in a headlock laughing loudly enough to attract the attention of the people around them as he breathless cried uncle. TJ released him, but only after giving him a light noogie. “Seriously though, what’s got you so happy? You ace a test or something?”

Cyrus shook his head and grinned. “You’re going to be really proud of me.”

“Oh, yeah?” 

“I asked Jonah out. He said yes.” 

TJ laughed. “No, seriously.”

“I am being serious,” Cyrus said. “I did everything as you told me! I waited for the right time, I was confident, I was prepared-” 

TJ stopped dead in his tracks. It took Cyrus a moment to notice that he had, so he had to turn and walk back to him. He’d honestly thought TJ would be excited for him, but the expression on his face was anything but. He looked… hurt, almost.

“Right…” He said slowly, looking past Cyrus. “Right. You asked Jonah out, and he said yes. Of course he did because he’s Jonah freakin’ Beck.”

“I-is everything okay?” Cyrus asked, uncertain. He felt wrong-footed all of a sudden, unsure of what to do in the face of this reaction. TJ sighed, and seem to shake himself out of whatever brief weird funk he’d fallen into. He looked at Cyrus and smiled, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“Everything’s fine, man. I’m happy for you,” He patted Cyrus on the shoulder. “I guess you don’t need me anymore, huh?” 

“I’ll always need you,” Cyrus said, earnestly. “We’re friends” 

TJ’s smile was somewhat pained as he took a step back. Cyrus couldn’t understand it. He’d never seen him act like this before, was it something that he had said? 

“Right, friends. Listen, I gotta go… I’ll see you later, ‘kay,” TJ said, backing away.

“Wait,” Cyrus called after him. “What about the library? I thought we were studying tonight?”

“I can’t, I got called into work. Sorry!” TJ yelled back, and with that he turned the corner and disappeared, leaving Cyrus feeling as if he was missing something important.


	8. Eight

The rest of the week went by without Cyrus seeing TJ once. After a few days it had started to feel like TJ was avoiding him, and he didn’t know why. He didn’t enjoy how it felt to have his calls dodged, and TJ’s absence left a bigger hole in Cyrus’ life than he ever would have anticipated. Every day he thought of at least one hundred things he wanted to tell TJ, only to turn around and to find no one there, and his texts went unanswered. Eventually, he stopped trying and decided the best course of action was to give the boy some space and let him explain when he was ready. 

Getting ready for his date with Jonah was a calmer affair than Cyrus had anticipated. He didn’t struggle to pick an outfit, knowing Jonah he’d end up wearing a t-shirt and jeans, so Cyrus dressed similarly. He left his hair as it was, not knowing what else to do with it without Buffy and Andi to help. He didn’t even have to wait for Jonah to pick him up, or go to pick Jonah up, as they had agreed to meet at the gallery. Unsurprisingly, Jonah managed to be fifteen minutes late, but Cyrus let it slide. After all, Jonah was  _ never  _ on time, even if he was eager to do something.

“Hey, sorry, I got distracted on the way here,” He greeted Cyrus as he walked up the gallery’s front steps to meet him. “My neighbour got a new dog. You should see her, so cute!”

“It’s fine,” Cyrus waved off his apologies. “Dogs are the best reason to be late. We should get inside though, our tickets are for seven.” 

They hurried inside and managed to get into the exhibition just in time. It really was a pretty cool show, even if guitars weren’t really Cyrus’ thing. Jonah bubbled with excitement and kept up a stream of happy chatter as they wandered around. Cyrus didn’t know half of the bands he was talking about, but he was happy to listen to him talk. About halfway through things started to slide sideways. Cyrus couldn’t stop himself from checking his phone - the exhibition felt a lot longer than he thought it’d be. Jonah noticed and grimaced.

“I’m boring you.”

“No! No, you could never bore me,” Cyrus said. It was only a little bit of a lie. “I thought I felt my phone buzz is all.”

Jonah smiled apologetically, and they continued perusing the exhibits. “I’ll be honest,” Said Jonah. “I was kinda surprised you asked me to come with. I would’ve thought you’d ask TJ.”

Cyrus frowned. “What? Why?”

“I don’t know… you’ve been hanging out a lot lately.”

“He’s my friend.”

Jonah pursed his lips but said nothing. The next five minutes was an exercise in awkward silence. Cyrus didn’t know what to say, and Jonah didn’t seem to either. When they were hanging out just as friends it was a lot simpler, Cyrus was realising. Topics of conversation didn’t come to mind as easily when he was thinking about how to impress Jonah. For a moment he wondered why he was even trying. 

They stopped in front of a large glass case containing an old guitar. The plaque on the front informed them that it had belonged to some incredibly famous rock legend that Cyrus had never heard of in his life, but Jonah seemed excited by it so he put effort into seeming a little more enthusiastic than he was.

“Oh man, Walker would love this,” Said Jonah, pulling out his phone and snapping a photo.

“Walker?” Cyrus asked. “As in Andi’s art pal Walker?”

“Yeah! He loves this sort of thing,” Jonah replied, then seemed to remember something very suddenly and gave Cyrus a serious look. “You know... I completely forgot to tell you.”

“Tell me what?”

“Me and Walker are dating now,” Jonah said, beaming.

For a very brief moment, the world stopped turning, along with Cyrus’ heart. He stared at Jonah, wondering if he’d heard him correctly or if his brain had just short-circuited.

“You and Walker…?”

“Yep!” Jonah looked proud. “Awesome, right?”

It was then that everything clicked into place for Cyrus. Jonah’s sudden coming out, Jonah staring at them during Bex and Bowie’s wedding, his glances at their table during the reception… it wasn’t jealousy over TJ and Cyrus, it was because Walker had been sat with them. Oh no, Jonah thought he’d invited him here as a friend. 

“When did that happen?”

“A couple of days ago,” Jonah said. “After the wedding. I meant to tell you, but you were so busy with TJ.”

‘Right, TJ...” Cyrus said. “Is this why you decided to come out to your parents? Because you liked Walker?”

Jonah blushed and nodded.

“Oh, wow,” Supportive Cyrus. Be supportive. “That’s great, Jonah. I’m really happy for you.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

The thing that most confused Cyrus was that when he told Jonah he was happy for him he actually meant it.

 

*******

 

After having dinner at the diner with Jonah and listening to him gush about Walker, Cyrus realised he was not ready to go home, so he took a walk. After wandering around aimlessly for an hour or so, Cyrus found himself stood outside Andi’s door. He needed someone to talk to about all of this; he needed help unpacking his feelings. 

It was Amber who swung the door open, and upon realising who it was she grinned around the lollipop she was sucking on. 

“Cy-guy!” She greeted him merrily. “C’mon in, Andi’s baking. How was your date with Jonah?”

“It… wasn’t a date,” He said simply. Amber looked at him in confusion for a moment, before shaking her head and tugging him into the kitchen. She presented him to Andi, waving her lollipop around wildly as she spoke.

“I’m startin’ to think this boy doesn’t know what a date is,” she said. “He goes on dates with Kippen, tells me they’re not dates, then he asks Jonah out on a date and insists that was also not a date. I don’t understand!”

“If it helps,” Cyrus offered. “I’m confused too. I thought it was a date but,  apparently, Jonah and Walker are a thing now.”

“Jonah and Walker?” Andi gasped. 

“Like a thing  _ thing? _ ” Asked Amber.

Cyrus nodded wordlessly. Amber shoved him down onto a stool, marched over to the freezer and pulled out a pint of ice cream before dumping it in front of Cyrus along with a spoon.

“Talk,” she demanded.

“You want me to call Buffy?” Andi asked kindly, reaching for her phone.

Cyrus shook his head. “You know, the shocking thing is… I’m not actually upset.”

The girls did not look like they believed him even a little bit.

“No, seriously guys,” He sighed. “I’m confused about it too. When I asked Jonah to go to the gallery with me I really thought it would feel amazing, y’know? But it just felt so… ordinary? And we had a good time and everything, but it wasn’t all that different to the way things are when we hang out as buds. A couple of months ago if you’d told me Jonah was dating Walker I would’ve been crushed, but now… it barely even threw me when he told me. It was actually kind of a relief. Is that weird? ”

“Maybe you hyped it up in your head too much?” Andi suggested.

“Or maybe...”Amber said, a mischievous glint in her eye. “He’s not into Jonah anymore. You know you stopped talking about him as much when you started seeing TJ.”

“That is true,” Andi admitted. “You got a lot more confident too. I thought that was because TJ was telling you how to act, but I think maybe it might be that you just felt more comfortable when you weren’t focused on what Jonah thought of you. When you were looking at him as a friend rather than a crush.” 

“It’s so weird though,” Said Cyrus. “I liked him for so long and it’s like my feelings for him just vanished all of a sudden? I don’t know what happened.”

“TJ happened,” Amber said in a sing-song voice, digging into the ice cream with her own spoon. “You want to know what I think?”

“No offence, but not really.”

“Too bad, I’m gonna tell you anyway. I think that you weren’t ever really in love with Jonah, it was just a placeholder crush. Then TJ came along and boom! Feelings. Your crush didn’t just disappear, it was never there, and now you’re confused because you actually have a crush on somebody and that somebody isn’t Jonah.”

“What’s a placeholder crush?”

“You know, when you think you have a crush on someone but it’s really just that you’re good friends and you think you  _ should  _ have a crush because that’s what expected, but that’s not actually how you felt.”

It was simultaneously one of the most ridiculous and most sensible things Cyrus had ever heard come out of Amber’s mouth. Andi, typically, looked proud to have such a smart girlfriend.

“So you’re saying,” Andi said. “That Cyrus didn’t actually like Jonah, but he likes TJ and he feels weird because he thinks he should really like Jonah?”

“Exactly.”

“So, do you?” Andi said, looking at Cyrus questioningly. 

He thought about it for a moment. He thought about all the times TJ had made him laugh so hard in the library that the librarians had told them to be quiet or leave. He thought about the way TJ would pick up half his books for him so that Cyrus’ back didn’t hurt so much when they were walking. TJ’s euphoric cheer when he finally caught a piece of popcorn between his teeth at the drive-in theatre, the way TJ looked in skinny jeans and how is made Cyrus’ mouth go dry. How his pulse sped up when TJ would lean over to talk to him. All the late-night phone calls, and the way he wished he never had to stop reading TJ’s stories. The way night’s with TJ made him feel like he was walking on air.

“Oh my God, I’m in love with TJ,” Cyrus groaned and let his head thunk into his folded arms on the table. “My head hurts. This is too much.”

Amber patted him sympathetically with his spoon. “It’s alright my grasshopper, one day I’ll teach you all the world’s secrets.”

“No thank you,” Cyrus mumbled. “I don’t need lessons in anything else, I’ve had enough of those recently.”

“Fine. Well, now we’ve got that sorted why are you still here?”

Cyrus looked up her. “What do you mean why am I still here? I’m in a crisis! I need help. I thought I was in love with one straight boy, he turned out not to be straight, it turns out I’m not actually into him and I am in fact into a straight boy!”

“It’s come full circle,” Said Andi, solemnly.

“Wait, I’m confused,” Amber frowned. “Who’s the straight boy?”

Andi and Cyrus looked at one another in exasperation. “TJ, duh,” They said in unison.

“TJ?” Amber said, beginning to laugh. “Oh my God, you idiots. TJ’s not straight. You’ve spent the last few months with this boy and you never figured that out? Jeez.”

“I don’t know what’s happening right now,” Cyrus said as Amber continued to cackle. She thumped her hand on the counter a few times, then pointed her spoon at him with a wicked grin.

“You’re an idiot, is what’s happening. TJ’s not straight, God no. Don’t you remember all that drama from last year when he was dating that Reed kid? Even people in my grade heard about that.”

Andi gently removed Amber’s spoon from her grip and held her firmly in place by the shoulders. “Explain.”

After a moment, Amber calmed down enough to tell them the whole story. Last year TJ had been going out with Reed, one of his oldest friends. They’d all been out dirt-biking when Reed had pulled out his father’s gun. He wanted to use it for target practice, like, apparently he thought it would be fun. TJ disagreed, he ended up telling the police about it. Reed and TJ had broken up after a long, loud and very  _ very  _ public argument over it, according to Amber. They hadn’t spoken to each other since.

“How do you know they were just friends?” Andi asked.

“Oh, they were always making out at parties and stuff,” Amber said, flippantly. “Which you’d know if you ever  _ came to any parties. _ ”

Andi sighed. “We’ve talked about this.”

Cyrus ignored it as the two girls started to bicker, it was a disagreement they had regularly. Amber was a party person, Andi wasn’t, yada yada yada. He had more important things to focus on.

“Do you think TJ likes me back?” He asked loudly.

If Amber had rolled her eyes any harder, Cyrus was sure they would’ve gotten stuck.

“ _ Obviously, _ ” She said. “I would’ve thought you’d figured that out ages ago. Have you seen the way that boy looks at you? It’s like you’re the only person in the world who matters when he’s with you. It’s disgusting, actually.”

“Marty did say he talks about you a lot,” Andi mused. “And that ‘fake date’ was pretty romantic for something that wasn’t meant to be.”

“But… surely he would’ve said something. He was helping me woo Jonah! He wouldn’t do that if he was into me.”

“Maybe he’s a masochist,” Amber said. “Also stupid. Plus he didn’t really know you when he agreed to help, he was probably in too deep by the time he realised he liked you.”

“I don’t know… he’s been avoiding me lately.”

“Hm. When did he start avoiding you?”

“Just after… oh. Just after I told him I asked Jonah out.”

Both girls gave him a pointed look.

“I’m an idiot,” He said.

“You’re a boy,” Amber shrugged. “It’s expected.”

“I have to tell him,” Realisation dawned on Cyrus. “I have to tell TJ I like him.”

“You do that,” Amber nodded. “And while you’re doing that tell him I said he’s an idiot too.”


	9. Nine

It was Mrs. Kippen who opened the front door when Cyrus knocked. Recognition flickered in her eyes and she beamed Cyrus introduced himself. He couldn’t help but notice she and TJ had the same smile, slightly cheeky and rather adorable. She welcomed him in cheerfully.

“It’s nice to finally meet you,” she said. “TJ talks about you a lot. I’m glad he’s making new friends. Make yourself at home, let me know if I can get you a glass of water or anything. He should be in his room.” She ushered him upstairs, directing him to TJ’s bedroom. “End of the hall on the left. You’ll probably be able to smell it before you see it,” She joked, and rolled her eyes. “Boys.”

Cyrus found the door easily and paused to steel himself. His nerves felt like they’d been electrified, and his heart was thumping so hard he was sure it would jump right out of his ribcage in anticipation. After a moment, he finally gathered up the courage to knock.

“Not now, Mom!” Came TJ’s voice.

“Uh… it’s not your mom!” Cyrus called back.

There was a bit of muffled swearing and a couple of thumps, then TJ appeared, opening the door a crack. It was as if he had just rolled out of bed; red-faced, hair mussed, shirt pulled on haphazardly. 

“Cyrus,” He said. “What are you doing here?”

“I need to talk to you.”

“Now’s not really a good time…” 

“It’ll just take a second!” Cyrus quickly, afraid that TJ might shut the door in his face.

TJ shifted awkwardly but looked at him expectantly. 

“Um…” And then it just came tumbling off his tongue, like word vomit. “So I realised today I don’t actually like Jonah. Like… my date with him sucked. I mean it was okay but in romantic terms it totally bombed, and not because it was a bad date or anything but because I realised I’m not actually all that into him after all…”

TJ’s eyes widened. Cyrus continued on. “...And I was talking to Andi and Amber about why that was, and I think I know why now-

“Cyrus, wait-”

“It’s because I like  _ you. _ ”

TJ gaped at him, and it was Cyrus’ turn to shift awkwardly. He took another deep breath. “Anyway, I know I probably should’ve figured that out a while back and I’m a little late to the party, but I think, or at least I hope that… maybe you like me too?”

There were two outcomes Cyrus had expected from this. Either TJ said yes and they skipped off happily into the sunset or it turned out TJ was not, in fact, into him like that at all and he stomped all over Cyrus’ heart while the world exploded around him. What actually happened was much  _ much  _ worse than the latter.

“Aw, how sweet,” Came a voice, and suddenly the door was pulled from TJ’s grasp, opening it wide to reveal Reed.

Reed. Pretty, blonde Reed, whom, as Cyrus had learned only an hour ago, had been TJ’s last boyfriend. Reed, who had just listened to Cyrus pour out his heart to TJ. Reed, who was not wearing a shirt. Cyrus stared at him. Reed leaned casually against the doorframe and smiled lazily.

“Wow, where’d you dig up this one, Teej? He’s cute.”

Blood pounded in Cyrus’ ears. It felt like someone had just grabbed hold of his heart and yanked it right out of his chest. His throat felt thick, and he forced himself to swallow down the lump forming there. God, he was such an idiot. How could he have believed that somebody like TJ would ever like someone like him? TJ was handsome and popular and athletic; Cyrus was just… Cyrus. He was unremarkable. How did he always manage to do this to himself? He had to get out of here.

He turned, ignoring TJ’s voice calling after him, and fled. 


	10. Ten

It took several weekdays and a solid weekend of moping for Andi and Buffy to convince Cyrus to do something other than hide out in his bedroom wallowing in self-pity. He hadn’t seen TJ since  _ The Incident _ (which he was determinedly not thinking about… most of the time), and he’d been ignoring his calls. He felt bad for avoiding him, but the overwhelming feeling of humiliation was too much. He didn’t think he could handle TJ trying to apologise and let him down gently.

“C’mon Cy,” Buffy whined, tugging him up off his bed. “Homework can wait. You need to get out, this is unhealthy. You’re starting to worry your mom.”

Cyrus sighed and she shoved a set of clean clothes at him. “I’m not in the mood to go out, guys.”

“Too bad,” Said Andi. “Look, we don’t have to go out for long, we’re just going to the park. It’ll be fun, we can get some fresh air… you can go on the swings?”

They both had looks on their faces that suggested to Cyrus he didn’t have much of a choice in whether he went or not. Darn his friends for caring about him. He sighed again heavily to make his point, but he got dressed and followed them all the same.

By the time they were situated at the park, Cyrus had to admit the swings were making him feel a  _ little _ better. Andi and Buffy’s laughter was a nice antidote to sadness, even if he could just barely smile at their jokes. He was grateful for them trying to cheer him up all the same.

“Oh, I hear the ice cream truck,” Buffy said, perking up at the song tinkling in the distance. “Race you guys? Last one there’s a square?”

“You guys go,” Cyrus said. “I’m not really in the mood to run.”

Buffy squeezed his shoulder empathetically. “Okay, Cy. We’ll grab a cone for you. Be right back.”

He watched as the girls raced off in the direction of the truck, teasing each other with loud smack talk as they went. It made him smile a little more. Around him the park was alive with noise; kids played happily in the sun, adults chatted from where they watched on the benches, the occasional screech of laughter stuck out in the gentle summer hum.

Cyrus swung lazily, watching his feet drag in the wood chips. As he did, he remembered a song he used to sing with his mom when he came to the park.

“Legs go up, legs go down,” He sang to himself under his breath. “That’s how we make the swing go round. Drag your feet, you go slow, the more you drag the less you’ll go…”

“Nice song,” Came a familiar voice from behind him. Cyrus’ heart sunk as he twisted around to see TJ walking towards him. “What do you sing when you go down the slide?”

Cyrus stared at him and then, at a loss for anything else to say, blurted out, “what are  _ you _ doing here?”

“Mind if I sit?” TJ gestured to the empty swing next to him. Cyrus shrugged, and TJ sat. “You said you come to the swings when you feel bad about yourself. I’ve been coming here like every day for the past week, looking for you. That was a real dramatic scene you made the other day.”

“I should go-”

“No wait,” TJ said. “I’ll go. But can I at least just say I’m sorry first?”

Cyrus’ cheeks burned. He didn’t really want to hear TJ apologise for not feeling the same way, it was too much. He just looked away and shrugged.

“I didn’t know you were going to come over, and I didn’t know what you were going to say. If I had I wouldn’t have invited Reed over, and I definitely wouldn’t have let him meet you. Now you hate me,” He sighed. “Classic TJ, anything good I gotta ruin it.” Cyrus stared at him, and TJ got up again ready to leave. Cyrus wasn’t sure what kind of miscommunication they’d had here to result in TJ apologising, or why on earth he thought he hated him.

He meant to ask this, but he got stuck on something TJ had said, and what came out of his mouth was “TJ… you said you were going to apologise.”

TJ looked at him blankly. “I just did?”

“Actually, you didn’t,” Cyrus said, standing up.

“Yes I did,” TJ insisted. “I said I- hm. You’re right. Well, sorry for not saying sorry.” He turned to walk away again.

“So…” Cyrus couldn’t help himself, and TJ turned back around. “You’ve apologised for not apologising, but you still haven’t apologised.”

TJ’s brow creased in frustration. He stepped towards Cyrus. “You can be a little annoying you know that?”

“Well, you can be oblivious,” Cyrus said.

“Me?” TJ said, expression filling with disbelief. “I’m the one who’s oblivious here? Me?!”

Cyrus nodded firmly. 

“Oh my God,” TJ ran his hands down his face and groaned. “You’re ridiculous. I can’t believe you think that I’m the oblivious one here. I just spent two months hitting on you, and you didn’t even notice because you were too busy focusing on  _ Jonah Beck _ .”

“Excuse me I’m- wait, what?” Cyrus said. “You weren’t hitting on me.”

“Um, yes I was.”

“No, you weren’t! You like Reed! Remember him, your ex-boyfriend? If you liked me so much why didn’t you do something about it?!”

“Because I thought you liked Jonah!” TJ argued. “I don’t like Reed! Reed’s an ex. Old news. We were only together the other day because I was upset because you were  _ going out with Jonah  _ and I was trying to deal with it!”

“If that was the case then why didn’t you tell me you liked boys?!”

“Because I thought you already knew that, dumbass!”

“How was I supposed to know?!”

“ _ Everybody  _ knows!” TJ exploded. “Everyone knows I’m gay! Everyone knows me and Reed went out! Everyone except for  _ you  _ apparently. Because! You’re! Oblivious!”

They stared at each other, both panting slightly from the exertion of the argument. 

“You know what else you are?” TJ said quietly after a moment.

“What?” 

TJ stepped forward, right into Cyrus’ space. “You’re the only person I can talk to like this,” And then he kissed him.

Kissing TJ was like feeling the sun on your skin for the first time after a very long dark winter. The world around them quieted, and Cyrus’ heartbeat slowed. All he could feel was TJ’s hands cupping his face, warm mouth pressed firmly against his, and it was the greatest feeling in the world like everything had just clicked perfectly into place. It was only a moment, but it felt like a lifetime before TJ broke the kiss and rested his forehead against Cyrus’. He didn’t remove his hands, he just proceeded to tilt Cyrus’ face up so they were looking into one another’s eyes.

“Cyrus Goodman,” He said. “I’m telling you this now so there’s no possible confusion about it in the future, okay? I am in love with you. I think I fell in love with you about two seconds after we met, and I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you sooner.”

Cyrus’ heart sung. He smiled blissfully up at TJ. “We’re both kind of idiots, huh?”

TJ laughed quietly. “Definitely,” He breathed against Cyrus’ lips and leaned in to kiss him again. Cyrus stopped him suddenly and pulled back.

“Wait,” He said. TJ frowned. “I just remembered something important.”

“What?”

“I’m in love with you too.”

TJ rolled his eyes and reeled him back in.

 

*******

 

About five metres away stood Andi and Buffy watching TJ and Cyrus makeout by the swingset while they ate their ice creams.

“Boys are so dramatic,” Andi said.

“Idiots,” Buffy sighed, and they both smiled and left the boys to it.

  
  


**Epilogue**

 

Fifteen years later a detective novel hit the shelves of every bookshop in the country. It was a bestseller. The dedication read:

 

_ “To my husband, Cyrus, _

_ For always believing in me.” _

  
  


**END.**


End file.
